Never Again
by Arcadia Jones
Summary: A take on the relationship that could have been between Shepard and Garrus.   Starts at the end of ME1 and goes through ME2
1. Chapter 1

Author's Note: All right, so just a quick little detail on this story: I wanted to write a story that went through the entirety of a Shepard/Garrus relationship, starting with the first game and going through the end of the second. That being said, I will be focusing everything on those two, and thus a lot of the Mass Effect storyline will be overlooked (such as comrade missions, etc. in the second game). I'll do my best to give everyone their say—though you will notice a large lack of a few characters that I never really liked—but this story is for Garrus.

No matter how this ends up, I hope you enjoy the read!

One

He could remember every moment he had ever spent with her, from their first meeting on the Citadel—watching her throw her weight, unafraid of anything—to all the nights they had spent on the _Normandy SR-1, _getting to know one another. They had started as teammates bonded through necessity and mutual gain: they both wanted Saren dead. But that connection had deepened, until he found himself calling her his friend—best friend, even.

Shepard was always there with the sound advice, the comforting shoulder, the wry joke. He found it odd at first that she always wanted to talk to him; after all, how much could an ex-C-Sec officer and a Spectre have in common? How much could a turian and a human share, except for a past of bloody conflict and constant aggression? It didn't make any sense to him, and he tried to dissuade her from coming down to see him, but to no avail. No matter how vague or cold he might act, she would always show up again.

It didn't take long before he began looking forward to her visits; when she didn't visit, he would sometimes leave the security of the hold to find her. He had spent many nights in her cramped quarters, sharing a bottle of wine or talking about some facet of turian culture that she was interested in. It didn't really matter what they were talking about, just so long as they were close.

Now he stood in front of her cabin door, on the eve of what might easily prove to be their last night alive. Ilos waited just over the horizon, and Garrus Vakarian was just coming to terms with how he felt. Thinking about it made him feel foolish; after all, it was a given that turian/human relationships couldn't work if only for the allergic reactions the two species could ignite in the other. But still he found himself drawn here, distantly wondering what it would feel like to hold the fiery redhead in his arms. To feel her beneath him.

Mustering his courage, Garrus knocked on the door. A moment later, the metal frame _swished _open and there she stood, clad in a pair of loose pants and a tank-top. It was the most informal he had ever seen her dressed, and it was turning him on. Shepard looked up at him, a smile breaking across her strong features.

"What's up, Garrus?" she asked, leaning against the doorjamb.

The way her clothes hugged her figure…

"Erm, can we talk?" Garrus began thinking of anything and everything that would calm the fire raging in his stomach.

Nodding, Shepard swept her arm out in a gesture that invited him inside. He accepted the invitation gratefully, stepping inside while she closed the door. He had been in this room a million times, so why was it that this time he felt so out of place? Noticing his awkwardness, Shepard ushered him into a chair.

"Take a load off, buddy," she said. "You look stressed. What's on your mind?"

"Well, we will be arriving at Ilos soon," he reminded her, lowering himself into the offered seat. "Maybe I'm just worried about the mission?"

Shepard snorted derisively. "If that were the truth, you would come out and say so. You seem nervous about something, and since I know you're no coward, I'm guessing that it has nothing to do with the upcoming confrontation. I'm listening if you'd like to get this weight off your chest."

Weight off his chest, indeed…this shirt _was _beginning to feel a little cumbersome. It had seemed so easy, planning what he would say in the elevator. Walk in, take her in your arms, and profess your feelings. Simple as that! But of course, when it came to reality, things were never that easy. With her green eyes watching him, he couldn't remember how to speak. Didn't even know if he _could _speak anymore. All he could do was stare dumbly at her, fingers fidgeting in his lap.

Shepard watched him closely, trying to read him. She had come to know the turian well since they had started working together, and thus she knew it wasn't like him to act so awkward. Normally they talked so easily with one another, so why…

It dawned on her. The way he couldn't meet her gaze, the constant fidgeting, the darker blue tinting the scales of his cheeks… Garrus hadn't come here to talk; he had come here to _confess. _

She had been going through her own self-evaluation of her feelings, and Shepard knew that there was a very large part of her that wanted Garrus in a much more intimate way. For the sake of their friendship, she had not pursued her feelings any further than taking the simple pleasures of talking with him, being close to him whether it was down in the cargo hold or in her cabin. But now Garrus was showing a side of himself she had not thought to see; if her feelings were reciprocated…then it was possible that she could finally rid herself of the painful heat that constantly burned in her gut every time she saw him.

Garrus was still ruminating over an answer when Shepard suddenly stood and walked over to him, leaning over his chair so that their faces were mere inches apart. His eyes widened in shock, knees trembling as her scent—that heady mix of warrior and woman—washed over him in intoxicating waves. If she kept this up, he wasn't sure how much longer he could keep his hands from touching her.

"Shepard…what…?" he tried to scoot backwards, but she just followed him, green eyes boring into his soul.

Words were useless now; the only way Shepard could make herself understood was through action. It was the same way they had met, and the same way they had connected through every mission, working in perfect harmony. And so she silenced his sputtering by pressing her lips against the smooth scales of his mouth. Shepard hadn't been sure how kissing an armored species like a turian would work, but he seemed to respond to her touch—taloned hands resting themselves on her narrow hips.

She pressed her tongue against his mouth, willing him to open up. Garrus complied uncertainly, then gasped as her soft pink tongue entered him, rubbing up against his own twitching tongue before exploring further. His taste was exotic, as she had expected; a mix of sharp spices and musk. Shepard had kissed plenty of men in her day, but none of them compared to the flavor of her turian.

Garrus was speechless; it was much this same scenario he had hoped to enact while journeying to her cabin, but never had he believed it would actually happen. His hands stroked the taut muscles of her sides beneath her shirt, a part of him wishing that he could just tear the offending piece of cloth away. But he still wasn't sure what to do with what she was offering, and wasn't sure if she really wanted to take it any farther. Besides, there was always that pesky allergy-thing to take into consideration. He could already feel his mouth beginning to swell, and finally he forced himself to break away though his groin screamed at him for an idiot.

"Shepard…we can't…" His breath came out in short, rough pants—hands trembling as he held her away. Looking up at her, Garrus cursed himself. The soft flesh around her lips was already beginning to turn a light red, the lips swelling up slightly.

"We can do whatever we damn well please, soldier," she growled, fighting to get closer.

"No, we can't!" he said more forcefully, tightening his grip. "There's a reason that you don't see many turian and human relationships."

Shepard cocked a curious eyebrow at him, and he sighed. "Go look in the mirror."

She obeyed, making her way over to the bathroom. When she returned a moment later, she did not try to jump him again, even though the hungry look had not left her eyes. Shepard stared down at him like a predator, and it turned him on in a way he had not thought possible.

"I can handle it," she stated firmly, taking a step closer. "And you can wear a condom." Another step. "I'm not afraid, Garrus." She was right over him now, her breath low and ragged. "So what are you waiting for?"

Garrus didn't know how he managed it with the fire now raging in his pants, but he still managed not to reach up and crush her to him. But spirits how he _needed _to. He could die tomorrow if only he held her in his arms right now. And yet still doubt plagued him; if the worst came to pass, then there was the possibility that Saren could succeed because the Commander sworn to defeat him had been laid up by anaphylactic shock through…ingestion…

Clearing his throat, Garrus swiftly stood and danced out of her path, turning his back to her so that that look in her eyes wouldn't make him change his mind. He didn't see the hunger turn to hurt as Shepard stared at his back, heart heavy and pride bruised. She had earnestly believed that he felt the same way, but now he was letting logic get in the way. Or perhaps it was a social pressure type of thing. Xenophilia was certainly not a widely accepted trait within humanity, and she could only imagine what turian society thought about such relationships—especially with a human, considering their two species' dotted pasts. She had hoped that such trivial considerations wouldn't interfere…but looking at his back, she realized how wrong she had been.

And now she was left standing alone—looking like a fool—for throwing her cards on the table before knowing all the facts.

"I'm sorry, Garrus," she murmured. "I thought…I thought that I knew what you came here for, but apparently I was wrong. Please, just…forget this ever happened."

He whirled around, finally realizing what his refusal had done to the woman he most respected. Before he could think about what he was doing, Garrus was standing in front of her once more, his hands on her shoulders.

"Shepard, no! It's not like that! I just…there's so much at stake here, with Saren and Sovereign, that I don't think we should be taking the risk. I came up here because…well, because I was being a fool. I wanted to tell you…that…that…" The words dried up in his throat. Truly, Garrus wasn't sure if what he felt was truly love, or just a manifestation of the respect he had for her as a leader in addition to his own "blue balls." It had been a long time…and Garrus was afraid that perhaps his attraction was only a temporary lust; and when it was over, would everything they had built be ruined?

He sighed, hands falling away from her shoulders as he took a step back. "I came here to see if there was anything you needed before we reach Ilos."

It was pathetic, but it was the best he could do. Garrus tried not to look at the pained expression she couldn't quite hide, hating himself for doing this to her. But it had to be done. Spirits, he was a fool for coming here.

"All preparations have been taken care of," Shepard replied mechanically. "I suggest you get some rest before we reach Ilos. Dismissed."

"Shepard—"

"I said dismissed." The cold glare in her eyes was enough to tear his heart apart. Bowing his head, Garrus obeyed, heading back for the elevator. He took one last look back before the doors to her cabin closed, despairing at the barely-concealed pain that ran along the tense line of her shoulders. Her back was to him, but Garrus could imagine what her face must look like. Finally, the doors of the elevator shut him off, and he was descending into the dark.

Shepard waited for the elevator to begin its journey down before she allowed the full brunt of her emotions to overtake her. With a sob, she crashed to her knees, burying her face in her hands. It was so _stupid _to cry like a teenage girl whose boyfriend just dumped her, but she couldn't help it. Shepard had been hiding her feelings for the turian for so long, that when she had finally laid them out on the table only to be rejected, it was too much. Her heart was aching; at the same time, her lust was aching as well. Being so close to him, tasting him…that alone had nearly been enough to drive her over the edge.

There was still time before they reached Ilos, and Shepard was now determined to spend the last of that time with herself in the shower. She paused only long enough to make sure that her cabin door was locked, and then headed into the bathroom.


	2. Chapter 2

Two

Garrus and Shepard sat in the backseat of the MAKO, holding on for dear life as Tali'Zorah nar Rayyha manipulated the controls in the driver's seat. All around them, the geth rained death down on their truck, doing everything they could to stop the team from reaching the Conduit and finally confronting Saren. The Alliance had never thought to install seatbelts in their crafts, so it was inevitable that the pair in the back would jostle together.

Shepard had managed to stow her wounded pride away for the sake of the mission, but it was hard not to feel the bitterness from earlier churn in her stomach when Garrus's leg pressed up against hers, or his arm. They were both gripping the little bars built into the ceiling for just such an occasion, doing their best not to look at one another.

"Hold on!" Tali cried, sharply turning the wheel.

Shepard cursed as she lost her grip and went crashing into Garrus. Acting purely on instinct, he released his own grip and put himself in between her and the side of the vehicle, grunting in pain as the hard metal of the MAKO's interior bruised him through his armor. The car continued to rock around them, but all Shepard could think of was the way that his arms were wrapped so tightly around her; the way she seemed to just fit against him. She looked over her shoulder at him, and realized her mistake.

She had wasted so much time getting angry at him for denying her, that Shepard hadn't noticed how much their confrontation in her cabin had hurt him, too. There was a desperation in his cool blue eyes tinged with pleading, begging her for forgiveness. Smiling, Shepard turned slightly so that she could better look him in the eye, reaching out to cup his face in her armored hand. As she had hoped, the action meant everything. There was no need for words.

"We're almost at the Conduit!" Tali informed them in a shout. "Brace for impact!"

Garrus's arms reluctantly released her as they straightened into their seats once more. Only this time, he gripped her hand in his. Shepard returned the grasp with equal intensity, wondering if her heart would explode in her chest from how hard it was beating.

Now, more than ever, there was something they both had to live for.

After their crash landing at the Citadel and a frantic flight to reach the Presidium where Saren was attempting to hack into the security systems of the station, Shepard was surprised she could still breathe. It had been a miracle for them to make it this far; it would take an even greater miracle for them to defeat this monster.

There was very little about Saren that looked organic anymore; his body was covered with glowing implants, the look in his eyes crazed. But at the same time, she could sense something in him that was fighting to free itself from Sovereign's iron grip, and it was to that identity that she made her appeal. The crazy thing was that he was actually _listening. _Saren might have always been a cold-blooded individual, but Shepard wasn't trying to engage his morality; she was appealing to his pride.

Saren taking that gun to his own head was the biggest shock of all—or so she thought. Shepard had never imagined that Sovereign's control—its power—could be so complete. Watching Saren's body float back up to life, _changing_…it was enough to make even her unflappable courage falter. But with Garrus's firm presence at her back, she shook away her hesitation and charged in with a roar.

Fighting a reaper-controlled Spectre was no easy feat; Shepard was no biotic, and even though Garrus's aim was as impeccable as ever, it just wasn't enough. Every time she charged—the adrenaline pumping through her veins—Shepard found herself being thrown back as easily as one might throw a toy.

Sovereign-Saren was bearing down on her, its blue-glowing eyes hungry for her blood. Shepard tried to retreat, only to trip over a bit of debris. Cursing, she brought her assault rifle to bear, waiting for it to get close enough so that she could bury the barrel under its unprotected chin. Garrus shouted something before squeezing off a shot that connected solidly with the beast's head, knocking the carapace-covered skull back.

Shepard took the opening without hesitation.

Pressing the barrel of her rifle against the soft flesh of his throat, she pulled the trigger, roaring as the bullets ripped through tendon and muscle. Blue blood splattered her face, but she ignored it. Just held down on the trigger until the bastard's head was well and truly off. It wasn't until the creature's body had slumped to the ground and the adrenaline began to wear off that Shepard realized one of his taloned hands had reached her arm, the sharp claws still buried in her flesh. Wincing, she pulled the blade-tipped fingers free, praying that her armor had managed to absorb the worst of the strike.

Garrus and Tali were next to her in a moment, and together the trio stared down at Saren's headless corpse. It was hard to imagine that it was all finally over…perhaps because it wasn't. Shepard raised her head, trying to get a glance of Sovereign's real body as it bore down on the station. She had given the order to protect the Council at any cost in spite of Garrus's protests and her own misgivings. The Council might not be worth even one human life, but she knew that things would go badly from here on out if she let them die. And thus logic had won out over emotion again, and they watched as the Alliance Navy surrounded the _Destiny Ascension, _protecting it from the swarming geth fleet.

They didn't notice their danger until it was almost too late. Tali was the first to realize that Sovereign was right above them, and as the _Normandy _swooped in to deliver yet another damaging blow, she knew that the glass ceiling of the Council Chamber would not protect them from what was to come.

"Um, guys?" she said, nervously taking a step backwards. "I think we should get out of here."

Shepard and Garrus finally realized what she had and the trio quickly began their retreat. Mere moments later, large chunks of Sovereign began raining down through the ceiling, showering them with a downpour of fire and metal and alien technology. Shepard hung back to make sure that her team made it out alive, Tali especially struggling to move quickly as the ground shook beneath their feet.

"C'mon, Tali!" Shepard shouted, gripped the quarian's arm and shoved her forward. "No falling behind now!"

"SHEPARD!"

She looked up at Garrus's cry just as an enormous mass of reaper hurtled towards them. Moving quickly, Shepard shoved Tali towards the turian before trying to move her own self out of the way. The last thing Garrus saw was the slab of metal coming in between him and his Commander before the shockwave of the impact sent him and Tali flying across the room. His head struck a concrete wall, and all went black.

When he next opened his eyes, Garrus found himself looking at Liara T'Soni, their asari archaeologist. Scientist. He couldn't seem to remember right now…

Her full blue lips parted in a strained smile when she noticed his cognition returning. "Welcome back," she greeted simply, as if he had merely been on vacation, not fighting Saren—

That thought brought him to full attention. Liara quickly moved out of the way when the turian's head snapped forward, muscles tense. Wildly, he looked around, searching for one face. When his eyes returned to Liara, he felt his heart sink at the way she could not meet his gaze.

"Where is she?" he asked hoarsely.

Liara shook her head. "We're not sure. The others are still sifting through the debris…but…"

Garrus shot forward, gripping her shoulders painfully in his talons. He shook her once. "She's not dead! Shepard _cannot _be dead!"

Tears shone in the asari's eyes, and he instantly let her go, ashamed. But he couldn't apologize, not yet. Not until he could hold Shepard once more, see her smile, hear her say something like…like…

"I'm not dead yet…you bastards…"

All heads turned to where Shepard stood, leaning against the chunk of Sovereign that had nearly ended her life. She was gripping at her side and there was a pronounced limp in the way she walked, but dear spirits, she was _alive. _

"Shepard!" Liara squealed, and was the first to reach her. Tali and Kaidan followed quickly after; even Wrex moved so that he could be closer to the Commander, though he would never lower himself to physical shows of affection like the others who kept touching her as if making sure she was really alive. Garrus wanted nothing more than to run to her like the others and to wrap her up in his arms, but he held back. There would be time enough later.

Shepard was laughing weakly at something Tali had said, though her eyes peered through the crowd quickly amassing around her to find his face. She smiled at him, and then winked. Garrus chuckled beneath his breath.

To the rest of the world, she would go down into the annals of history as a "Hero of the Citadel." But to him, she would always be the wise-ass human who knew the best ways to get under his skin. Mandibles flaring in a grin, he winked back.

The team returned to the _Normandy _after suffering through some political bullshit with the Council. Shepard shocked them all by endorsing David Anderson for the newly gained human Council seat instead of the career politician Udina, leaving the Council to bicker as she limped home.

The _Normandy's _crew cheered their Commander on as she boarded, hailing her as a hero. Shepard accepted their accolades calmly, though it was clear that she was not only overwhelmed but exhausted. It took a frightening roar from Wrex for everyone to finally back off and allow her to venture down to the medbay where Dr. Chakwas waited to inspect her.

Garrus paced the floor of his small cabin for a long time, mulling over all that had occurred. He assumed—hoped—that their moment in the back of the MAKO had given him another chance to get back in her good graces after his complete fuck-up barely a day ago. He didn't want her to think that he was still bitter or afraid, but neither did he want her to think that he was being pushy. Garrus was literally driving himself insane.

It was "nighttime" on the ship, and Garrus finally made up his mind. Clad in a more casual bodysuit, he exited his cabin and headed for the elevator. There was the sound of music and loud voices coming from the mess hall, and he made sure to avoid it completely. It was possible that Shepard was with them, celebrating; but he doubted it. Social functions of that sort had never really excited the more conserved woman, and if Garrus knew her like he thought he did, chances were good she was relaxing in her cabin.

The elevator reached her floor and he stepped out, nervousness making him clumsy. In his right hand, he grasped a tiny flower—one of the beautiful blue bells that grew in the Presidium. The place had been in ruins, but as they left the area to return to the ship, the little flower had caught his eye and Garrus picked it, thinking of Shepard. She wasn't exactly a soft woman, but he still hoped that she would like it.

Garrus knocked on the door to her cabin, and from within there was a muffled, "It's open!"

The door _swished _open and closed behind him, and Garrus found himself experiencing a slight déjà vu. Here he was, standing just inside her cabin, and there she sat in the same loose pants and tank top. Only this time, it wasn't lust that rolled through him but worry. Bandages hugged her upper right arm and he could tell from the extra padding on her chest that more bandages hid beneath the black fabric of her top. There were dark circles under her eyes as she smiled up at him, though she did not stand. Vaguely, Garrus wondered if she even could right now.

"Hey," she greeted simply, ignoring the reports on her desk for the moment.

"Hey." He took a few steps closer, hiding the flower in the curve of his hand. "Are you all right?"

Shepard shrugged, wincing. "Just a few bumps and bruises. Dr. Chakwas gave me some vile thing to drink and says I'll be fine in a few days. What about you? Liara said you hit your head pretty hard."

Unconsciously he raised his empty hand up to feel the back of his head where a large bruise was forming. It was tender, but definitely not life-threatening. But that was just like Shepard, thinking of everyone else before herself.

"I'll live," he replied with a turian version of a smirk.

An awkward silence descended on them then, Garrus looking at his feet while Shepard fiddled with some papers on her desk. She assumed why he was here, but rather than have a repeat of their last meeting, Shepard waited for him to make the first move. Tender feelings weren't Garrus's strong suit, and the only way they were going to get anywhere was for her to practice patience.

Finally, he spoke. "Shepard…I want to apologize, for…the last time. I didn't mean for things to go the way they did, but…damn it!"

Garrus threw his hands up in frustration as he began pacing the floor. Shepard continued to watch him, and then her eye caught on something small fluttering to the ground. Moving slowly, she knelt down and picked up a tiny blue flower. The bell-shaped petals were half-crushed, but the sentimentality of the simple thing struck her hard. Garrus hadn't even noticed her move, so busy was he ranting beneath his breath and pacing. Shepard held the little token close to her heart as she straightened and stood before the flustered turian. As he passed close to her, she reached out and grabbed his elbow, forcing him to stop and look at her.

His eyes noticed her opposite hand holding the flower next to her chest, and he paled. But before Garrus could begin giving some excuse or another, Shepard stood on her toes and placed a gentle, feather-light kiss on his mouth. A moment later she pulled back, moving her hand from his elbow to his cheek.

"Thank you," she whispered. "It's beautiful."


	3. Chapter 3

Author's Note: You'll have to forgive me for taking Garrus out of character, both here and later on in the story. The only excuse I'll give is the time-old, cliché saying that "Love can change a man!" I've also changed the way the beginning scene of Mass Effect 2 went down, since I thought it more appropriate to have him running to find Shepard rather than Kaidan or Liara (and sorry to all the Ashley fans out there, but no matter what play-through I am on, she ALWAYS dies on Virmire).

Three

They didn't make love that night, but rather fell asleep in one another's arms. And after that, there wasn't even time for cuddling. Between Shepard being called to the Citadel to explain her actions, or filing a new report, or attending some Alliance meeting or another, the only time she ever had to herself was spent trying to catch up on sleep. Garrus gave her space, hoping that they would have time to finally be alone once everything had gotten a chance to settle down. But he never stopped thinking about her. Every moment of every day, she was in his mind; he would never forget the sparkle in her eyes when she had held his little token close.

The few times that he saw her, he noticed that she kept the flower pinned to her collar for everyone to see. Perhaps they hadn't found the time to show each other how they felt, but that gesture was enough for Garrus to understand her heart.

Two weeks later they were in deep space on the Council's order, hunting for geth. It was a stupid mission, and they all knew it. The geth were merely the foot soldiers of a much larger threat—a threat that the Citadel and the rest of the galaxy wanted to ignore. Shepard was tense, every command clipped and impatient. She was hoping that they could get this patrolling mission over with quickly so that they could get down to the real business of figuring out when the Reaper fleet would arrive.

Garrus was looking over the propulsion systems with Tali on the engineering deck when the Collectors hit. The first blast sent people flying across the room as the ship lurched from the impact. Garrus was the first on his feet, helping Tali and the other engineers find their footing.

"What's happening?" someone screamed.

As if on cue, another crew member came hurtling down the stairs.

"We're under attack! The Commander has ordered everyone to the escape pods!"

Garrus felt his stomach sink down to his toes. As the other engineers scattered around him, he ran forward and grabbed the man who had announced the attack.

"Where is Shepard?" he shouted over the roar above them.

"She's up above sending out the distress beacon!"

Without another word, Garrus was sprinting up the stairs, pausing only long enough to grab his breather helmet. On the deck above, people were scattering every which way as they fought to make it into an escape shuttle. He fought his way past them, heading towards the black-armored figure trying to put out a fire with an extinguisher. It was a hopeless task; the fires were spreading too quickly.

"Shepard!" he cried, grabbing her arm. "What are you doing? We need to get out of here!"

"I know, but—"

"_Mayday, mayday, mayday!" _Joker's voice echoed above them. "_This is SSV Normandy! We've suffered heavy damage from an unknown enemy!"_

Shepard looked at him, her eyes steely. "Get to the escape pod! I'm going to get Joker!"

"No!" His grip on her arm tightened. "I will not leave this ship without you!"

"Get your ass on that shuttle!" she barked back at him. "There is an escape pod by the cockpit—I will meet you when we get out of this hellhole!"

Every instinct was screaming at him to throw her over his shoulder and get the hell out. But with the way she glared at him, he knew that such an act would end badly for him. Once Shepard got her mind set on something, it would take a supernova to move her. Reluctantly, he nodded.

"Good! Get everyone you can onto a shuttle on your way out!"

And with that, she was off. Garrus watched her go, wondering why his heart felt so cold.

"C'mon, Joker! We have to get out of here!"

"No! I won't abandon the Normandy_!_ I can still save her!"

"The Normandy's lost! Going down with the ship won't change that!"

Joker looked down. "Yeah, ok…help me up." When he raised his head, his eyes widened in horror. "They're coming around for another attack!"

Not waiting any longer, Shepard grabbed the pilot, heedless of his brittle bones as she dragged him out of his seat and nearly threw him into the nearby escape shuttle. But she didn't have time to follow him; all around her, the fires raged. Whatever was attacking them continued to hit the ship again and again with that deadly weapon. She slammed the button that would launch the shuttle, and then watched numbly as her ship crumbled around her. Then…Shepard was floating. The cold vacuum of space enveloped her, and before she knew it, the atmosphere of a nearby planet began drawing her in. The last coherent thought she had was an image of Garrus's face.

Laughing; shouting; smiling…every emotion, every word.

"I'm sorry I couldn't keep my promise…"

Garrus felt his heart seize up suddenly, a feeling of terrible dread descending on him. There was a small window in the pod, and he scrambled for it, pushing several other people out of his way to get to it. In the distance, he saw the ruins of the _Normandy, _slowly drifting down to the surface of the planet nearby. With his sharp eyesight, Garrus spotted something that looked like a person. It was impossible to tell anything else from this distance, but somehow he just knew that it was her.

"Shepard!" he gasped, hands gripping the edges of the window as if he could somehow reach her.

Moments later, the figure began its plummet into the atmosphere, the body now wreathed in flames. Garrus felt his heart rip in half.

"SHEPARD!"


	4. Chapter 4

Author's Note: I would highly recommend listening to "4:AM Forever" by Lostprophets whilst reading this chapter. The song fits what I imagine Garrus's mental state to be perfectly (assuming Shepard died at 4 AM, hehe).

"Far Away" by Nickelback also fits very nicely, if you want a softer tone.

Four

A year had passed since the _Normandy's _destruction, and Garrus sat alone in his tiny apartment somewhere deep within Omega's slums. A year, and yet he couldn't forget a thing. He couldn't bring himself to properly mourn her, because that would mean accepting that she was gone.

And that he could never do.

He had been fighting for a long time; he couldn't remember feeling so tired. With all that had happened, Garrus couldn't bring himself to go back to C-Sec and sit behind a desk the rest of his days, listening to how yet another crooked cop had managed to slip through the system or how another rich politician had managed to buy his way out of well-earned jail time. The corruption was spreading thicker, and he felt as if it were time to take the matter of doling out justice into his own hands.

Besides…the only time he ever stopped feeling the pain was when he was in the middle of a gunfight, wondering if this time that bullet would get past his armor and end his life. Perhaps if there was some paradise waiting for him at the end of it all, Garrus would be able to spend it with her. No matter what came, anything was better than the hell he was living now.

Garrus had built a good team of men who were all sick of listening to the hype, just like him. They had been wronged and they were willing to try and make the galaxy just a little better—one dead merc at a time.

There was a knock on his front door, startling Garrus from his thoughts. His talons tightened around the barrel of his sniper rifle, eyes wide and wild.

"Garrus? It's me."

He sighed in relief. Sidonis. Rising creakily to his feet, Garrus moved to the door and opened it a crack, looking out at his turian partner.

"What's up?"

"I just came to ask if you could meet me tomorrow…down by the docking bay." There was a shifty look in the turian's eyes, but Garrus didn't notice it. "I need your help with something."

Garrus nodded. "Sure thing. What time?"

"How about around nineteen-hundred hours?"

"Gotcha. Be careful on your way back. I saw some batarian gangsters lurking down the street a couple of hours ago."

"Oh, um…right. I'll watch my back. Take care, Garrus. I'll see you tomorrow."

Closing the door once more, Garrus resumed his seat on the pathetic excuse for a bed he kept shoved in the corner. Distantly he wondered what Sidonis needed him for—the man had looked awfully troubled—but quickly brushed it off. His friend would tell him when he needed to know, and that was enough.

As his body settled once more, his thoughts began drifting back down their previous path. He saw Shepard's face, and if he closed his eyes, he could feel her lips pressing against him. Garrus cursed himself for a fool for not letting her know how he truly felt…a coward for leaving her alone on that ship…

His eyes burned as if with tears, only there were no tears left. In the days following Shepard's death, every last bit of moisture had leached out of him. The only thing left within Garrus now was a void that threatened to consume everything—everyone—around him. It was for this reason that even though he trusted his companions, he never let them get too close; never let them know his true heart. Despite that, he was always willing to help them, and even found himself laughing at times when they sat together after a job well done.

Perhaps, given enough time, he would be able to at least dull the pain. It would never leave him completely, but with good friends—and a lot of good turian booze—maybe it was possible to find himself another reason to live.

For now, though, he would continue to suffer. It was the only way he could be sure that he would never forget her.


	5. Chapter 5

Five

_One year later…_

Surely he was hallucinating. All those hours spent in his sniper perch, looking through that scope, and now he was finally going crazy. There were ghosts chasing him.

Garrus looked through the scope once more, quickly dispatching another foolish freelancer before centering his sights on the ghost. Red hair…determined step…proud head held high…

The spirits were fucking with him. His insanity had sunk so deeply into the fibers of his being and now the spirits were tugging on his heart strings. There was no other possible explanation. As soon as she reached the stairway, she would surely vanish.

_Still there._

The ghosts were getting closer…down the hall now…their footsteps echoed on the tile.

_Don't look._

The door behind him _swished _open and the ghosts were inside. Garrus didn't turn around, just kept his attention focused on the scrambling mercs below.

"Archangel?"

Oh, these ghosts were good. Even the voice sounded like hers…

He held up a finger and then took aim once more, narrowing the crosshairs of his scope on the skull of a ballsy mercenary who had managed to make it into the lounge beneath his perch. With a squeeze of the trigger, the man's head disappeared in a spray of gore. Satisfied that he had some time before the attacks resumed, Garrus straightened and turned around, slowly taking off his helmet. He sat on the back of a nearby chair, one leg extended out as he regarded the face of his sweetest dreams, and darkest nightmares.

"Shepard."

She had thought it a distinct possibility that maybe, just _maybe,_ this "Archangel" was her missing turian. But thinking it and seeing his face were two completely different things. Ever since her Cerberus-funded resurrection, Shepard had been determined to find out what had happened to him. She had grilled the Illusive Man for information, and unbeknownst to them both, he had provided it. Seeing him now, her heart was soaring.

"Garrus! What are you doing here?"

"Oh, you know. Just keeping my skills sharp with a little target practice."

There was something troubling about the deadness in his voice. Even his eyes were glassy, looking at her but not really seeing her. Shepard was worried, but there would be time enough later on to figure out what was wrong. Right now, the only important thing was getting Garrus out of this mess. And that meant fighting their way through three mercenary bands.

Working quickly, Shepard explained that they were there to help him. Garrus seemed to accept her words without too much complaint, and they quickly formulated a plan to take care of the mercs. No matter his emotional health, his mind was still sharp and able to think fast under duress. And so the fight began.

Shepard wasn't sure if she would ever be able to get the image of Garrus's broken body out of her mind. Watching as the machine gun turrets of the gunship tore into his armor…watching him fall…

All she saw after that was red.

Any merc foolish enough to get in her way was ripped apart. Miranda and Jacob tried to keep up with her—tried to keep her from getting killed—but Shepard certainly didn't make it easy. Her methods might be suicidal, but this time they proved effective. Within minutes, the mercs were all dead and their gunship left in smoking ruins.

Breathing heavily, Shepard didn't put her rifle away until the adrenaline pumping through her veins finally began to fade. She turned slowly to where Jacob and Miranda were kneeling over Garrus, their boots squeaking in the pool of blue blood pooling beneath his body.

Shepard took a tentative step closer, thinking how unfair it was that after all this time, after all she'd been through, he would be taken away from her now, when she had finally found him once more. She knelt beside him, tracing her fingers along the carapace of his strong jaw.

"Garrus…"

He was drifting in darkness, feeling oddly at peace. Perhaps now he could finally be reunited with his human. The light of consciousness waited just ahead, but that wasn't what Garrus wanted; waking up would draw him back into hell. And so he let himself drift further down into the darkness…

_Garrus…_

Wait…that voice…from the light? How could that be? Shepard should be waiting for him beyond, not where had had come from. The only thing that waited in the light were the ghosts.

As if set free after a long time cooped up, his rational mind tore through the insanity and took control.

_Get your ass back there! _It shouted at him. _Stop being so goddamn fatalistic and open your eyes! Shepard is waiting for you…are you going to keep her worrying?_

_No!_

With that one word, his mind was wrenched back into the light. Garrus opened his eyes—and gasped in pain. The right side of his face was on _fire. _He could feel the barrel of his sniper rifle just under his fingers, and he grasped it. Not so much because he needed the protection—or could use it even if he did—but rather because it was this rifle that had kept him alive this long, and perhaps its power would give him the strength to keep living.

"Garrus! Hold on!"

Shepard's voice was right in his ear, her armored hand touching his face. There were other hands on him, turning him as packet after packet of medigel was applied to his wounds, but her touch was all that Garrus could feel. This time, when he slipped into darkness, Garrus knew that he would come back. What he had been waiting for was within reach now, and there was no way he would let her get away from him a second time.

Shepard stood in the debriefing room, arms crossed over her chest as she leaned up against the table, brow furrowed in thought. There were many things that needed to be done—such as finding that doctor the Illusive Man had mentioned—but she hadn't had the heart to leave the ship just yet. Not while Garrus's life hung on the precipice just a floor below her. Seeing his face had been a dream come true, but she was still worried about that strange look in his eyes when they had spoken for the first time in two years.

Perhaps their relationship had never progressed the way they had wanted, but there had still been a connection. Shepard still remembered the flower he had given her…thought it, too, had been lost in the burning wreckage that was the _Normandy SR-1._ But she kept a picture of it in her mind always…that was one memory that hadn't been lost to death.

Across the room, Jacob watched her. He was a soldier, not a psychiatrist, but even he could tell that there was something more than the simple concern for a friend hidden behind the Commander's carefully constructed mask. Jacob himself had never been attracted to another species—apart from a few asari—so it didn't make sense to him, but that didn't matter. All that mattered was that she keep a level head, and that meant making sure the turian pulled through.

"Dr. Chakwas is doing everything she can for him," he commented, drawing Shepard out of her thoughts. "There was some extensive damage done to his face, and she had to use cybernetic implants, but he should pull through…we hope."

Her features didn't change, but there was subtle shift in her eyes as of hope dying. Jacob cursed inwardly. _Smooth move, bud._

Before he could continue to bury himself, the doors to the room slid open and there he was. Shepard looked up, mouth agape, as Garrus stepped in. The right side of his face was a mess of scab and bandage and the armor at his neck bore a new gaping hole, but those eyes were the same…and they were no longer dead. Blue eyes met green and Shepard shivered.

Far from dead.

"Tough sonuvabitch," Jacob remarked with a smirk.

Garrus nodded slightly in his direction, but otherwise ignored the human. Jacob looked in between the turian and Shepard, realizing that he was no longer needed. With a quick salute to his commanding officer, he exited the room. Alone at last, Garrus shifted his weight onto one foot, eyes scorching her as he drew them up and down her body. She shivered again.

"So, no one would give me a mirror," he said, voice not hinting at the hunger glowing in his eyes. "How do I look?"

Shepard returned his scrutiny, raking her eyes down his body. "Hell, you were always ugly Garrus."

His mandibles flared in a grin, and with three large steps he was in front of her, taloned hands gently cupping her face, gently tracing her glowing scars. Shepard leaned her head back to look him in the eye, every fiber of her being begging to touch him, to feel her skin pressed against him…

"It's good to see you," he murmured.

"Yeah." It was all she could say.

"Did you…did you really die?"

Shepard couldn't look him in the eye just then. "Yes."

Garrus's hands tightened their grip, but he didn't say anything. There was a wild tension about him, but he still exercised patience. Shepard hadn't been quite ready to get into this conversation, but she owed him that much.

"When I went back to get Joker…the Collector ship came back around and hit the Normandy again. I couldn't make it into the shuttle, and…well…" She cleared her throat. Those were some of the memories she wished had been lost. The feeling of her eyes exploding…her lungs shriveling…her brain…

Garrus lowered his forehead to rest against hers, and Shepard breathed a sigh of relief. Silently, she thanked him before continuing:

"Cerberus rebuilt me. It took them two years and a lot of money…but apparently their leader decided I was worth it. I still don't trust them, but it would be foolish not to take the chance they are offering to stop the human abductions out here in the Terminus. And…well…" She finally lifted her eyes back up, reaching a tentative hand to the bandages on his face. "At least they let me see you again. I'm sorry I couldn't keep my promise."

A low, rumbling laugh rippled through his chest, tinged with hysteria. But instead of answering her, Shepard found her lips stolen by his scaled mouth. Closing her eyes, she let herself relax. It was nothing like kissing a human—soft and wet—but somehow it felt more right. His tongue pressed against the barrier of her lips and she obligingly opened wide—gasping as the prehensile limb entered her mouth and wrapped itself around her own tongue. The feeling was indescribable; her mind couldn't help but wonder what his tongue could do in a more sensitive place…

Garrus's arms moved so that they could wrap around her waist, crushing her against him. The hard ridges of his armor dug into her unprotected skin, but she hardly cared. A lot had changed in him; this was one change that she found horribly exciting. The shy and nervous Garrus was gone; this Garrus knew what he wanted, and wouldn't take no for an answer.

"W-wait," she gasped as he began carrying her towards the edge of the table—her legs wrapped around his waist. "What about the…allergy thing?"

Eyes still hungrily devouring her, he reached a hand into a pocket and produced a condom.

"Oh," was all she had time to say before his tongue was in her mouth once more, tasting every inch. They had reached the table, and Shepard grunted as Garrus pushed her up against it. With her braced against the edge, his hands began moving across her clothes, tugging at clasps and zippers. He growled and she couldn't help but giggle. His eyes glared at her for a moment and she glared back, the animalistic intensity driving her to even further heights of pleasure.

Between the two of them, her casual uniform was removed and tossed to the ground, leaving her clad only in a silky, dark blue bra and matching panties. Garrus stared at her body for a long moment, soaking up every detail. (Shepard silently congratulated herself on the foresight; normally she wore only simple cotton things that fit well beneath her armor.) Then it was a scramble to remove the buckles of his armor, the heavy pieces crashing to the floor.

It was the first time she had ever seen a naked turian; the metallic carapace covering his body glimmered in the low light of the room. Gaze travelling lower, Shepard watched as the soft head of a blue penis emerged from an opening in his armor, growing longer and longer. It was strange, but at the same time exhilarating.

Pausing a moment to put the condom on, Garrus moved against her once more, pressing his firm member against her silk-protected entrance. She gasped as he growled in her ear, grinding against her. Shepard raked her nails down the softer flesh of his neck, noting how it made the growling in his throat deepen.

"Shepard…" he breathed in her ear.

"Nnng…Garrus, please…"

His talons cut the sides of her panties, and then there was nothing more to get in the way. Shepard started to scold him—it wasn't often that she found the time to shop for new clothes!—but was silenced as he entered her. Throwing her head back, she let out a gasp of surprise, pain, and delight. It had been a long time even before her death since she had been touched by a man; now that her body was new, it was almost like being a virgin again.

Shepard gripped his shoulders tightly, leaning her head back as agony and ecstasy warred within her. Garrus moved slowly, gripping her bare flesh a little too roughly in his attempt not to lose control. But spirits, he had wanted this for so long…had dreamed of it…and now that he was here, buried within her warm, pliant body, it was a miracle that he even knew what control was anymore.

Rocking slowly, he looked up into her eyes. Shepard's brow was furrowed, her eyes closed tight, teeth digging into the pink flesh of her lower lip. Was she in pain? Garrus panicked and began to pull out. When she felt him leaving, Shepard clamped her legs down tight around his waist and slammed herself against him. Her eyes blazed as she glared at him.

"Don't…you…dare!"

That was all it took. Garrus leaned forward and sunk his teeth into the flesh of her throat as his hips began a frantic pace. Shepard gasped and wrapped her arms around his neck, pulling him even closer. Between the building friction of their bodies, the little moans escaping her throat, and the blood in his mouth, Garrus knew he wouldn't last much longer. It was a sensory overload; so long without her, and now he possessed her completely…

Shepard forced his face up so that she could kiss him just before they threw their heads back and came together.

Spent, Garrus rested his hands against the surface of the table on either side of her, face buried in her neck. Shepard kept her legs wrapped around his waist, her left arm looped over his neck while the right traced feather-light patterns down his back. They both groaned as he pulled out.

Garrus looked at the wound he had left on her neck and gently licked it in apology. Goosebumps spread over her bare flesh as she shuddered. The next time, she would have to put that tongue to good use.

"Shepard."

They jumped at the feminine, pixilated voice. Instinctively, Garrus drew himself in front of her in a protective attempt for her modesty. It was a touching sentiment, but Shepard knew it was unneeded. She laid a placating hand on his shoulder.

"Yes, EDI?"

"As this is your ship, you are of course licensed to do with it as you will. But might I suggest using a more private location? Two of the maintenance crew tried to gain entrance to the room during your activities. I kept the door locked, but don't be surprised if that begins drawing attention."

Shepard couldn't help but laugh. "Thank you, EDI. We appreciate it, really."

"Of course, Shepard."

Garrus looked at Shepard, and the two shared a smile.

"Guess we should get dressed," he remarked.

"Yeah, um…about that…"

"Hmm?"

"I…can't feel my legs."

Garrus stared at her, mouth slightly agape. Shepard could only shrug sheepishly. During, the nerves had begun to go numb; afterwards, they had completely fallen asleep. It had _really _been a while. A chuckle began to rise up in his throat, and then the turian threw his head back and began to laugh heartily—only to splutter and stop, one hand pressed to the ruined side of his face.

"Oh, don't make me laugh. My face is barely holding together as it is."

"I'm not joking!" she insisted. "Could you…hand me my pants?"

"Of course, my lady."

Garrus ducked down as Shepard threw one of his greaves at him, laughing. He pulled her close for another kiss before sorting through their clothes.


	6. Chapter 6

Six

After their foray in the debriefing room, Garrus had helped Shepard to the elevator and then to her quarters, where the pair flopped down on her bed and fell asleep in moments. It was in the curve of her turian's strong body that she awoke, his arms wrapped possessively around her. Shepard was sore, but happy. Happy to be alive.

She looked up at Garrus's face, amazed at how relaxed his sharp features were in sleep. Shepard wasn't sure if she had ever seen him so at peace. But she knew that as soon as he opened his eyes, the scars would be there. Tenderly, Shepard traced the tribal tattoos painted across his left cheek with her fingers. What had happened while she was away?

Reacting to her touch, the turian awoke, blue eyes blinking down at her blearily. Slowly, his mandibles widened into a grin.

"Morning."

Shepard smiled back. "Good morning."

"How are you feeling?"

"Well, my mouth's a little swollen, but I can feel my legs now." She winked at him then laughed as a light growl rumbled in his chest and his arms pulled her closer. "Easy tiger!"

"Never," he murmured, lifting himself up so he could lean over her, sharp teeth nibbling at her chin.

Shepard didn't want to push him away—that felt so damn _good—_but she knew that they couldn't do this right now. She had wasted enough time waiting for his recovery and no amount of love would stop the Collectors from abducting more colonists. With a groan, Shepard pushed up on his chest, rolling him off of her. The look on his face almost made her change her mind—but the Commander took over and Shepard forced herself to her feet.

"Shepard…can't the world wait?" The note of pleading in Garrus's voice was charming, if a little uncharacteristic for the normally stoic sniper.

"I wish it would," she mused softly. "But unless you want another EDI interruption, I suggest we get dressed." Shepard pulled a thin shirt over her head before looking back at him, smiling wryly. "We've got a world to save, bud. Are you with me?"

With swift, graceful movements, Garrus was on his feet and in front of her in moments. He rested a hand on her shoulder.

"You needn't ask."

Shepard ventured to the Citadel where she was reinstated as a Spectre. The title was more ceremony than anything, but as she had put it, "Better to keep them happy for now. They might actually prove useful in the days to come."

After that, it was easy to fall back into their battle groove, Shepard throwing herself into gunfights as always while Garrus covered her back with steady hands and well-aimed shots. They fought through swarms of mercenaries and geth, building up a team worthy of taking on the Collector threat. Garrus watched each new member with a skilled eye, giving Shepard his advice when she asked.

"Mordin's a smart one, and he can handle himself in a fight. A good, dangerous combination. Erm…maybe you could get some allergy medication from him too? On the sly, you know…

"Jack will be trouble if you can't keep her reigned in. But she's strong.

"Grunt could be dangerous, but then if you could handle Wrex, I have no doubt this big baby will be no problem for you. Just let me know if he needs a good concussive shot in the ass to keep him in line."

It was a bit strange to see all these new faces, but it was obvious that the Illusive Man had an idea of what he was doing. With a team like this, they stood a good chance. When the call came for them to head to Horizon, Garrus was eager to see these bastards for himself. It would feel good to kill some of the scum.

Shepard gathered Garrus and Mordin, the latter outfitting them with new armor he believed would stave off the paralyzing seeker swarms. The salarian didn't make his argument sound very comforting, but it was the best they had and there was no more time to waste.

Running through Horizon was an unsettling experience, with all the paralyzed bodies, buzzing swarms, and Collector pods littering the place. Shepard was quiet for the most part, though Garrus could tell that her mind was ticking as sharply as ever. There was much for the Collectors to answer for; this was just another brick in the wall.

"Take cover!" Shepard roared as the giant, alien monstrosity closed in on them.

Garrus and Mordin obeyed, ducking down behind some of the cargo that littered the area. But it was obvious that the construct was after Shepard, and the pair did all they could to slow the beast down.

Shepard cursed as the construct's heavy weapon beam struck the cover just above her head. She had a particle beam she had found in her hands, but it was difficult to find an opening when the damn thing wouldn't let up. It would have to recharge sometime—she hoped—and Shepard would make sure that she did not miss that opening.

_One…two…three…_

The attack stopped and she rolled out of cover, aiming her heavy weapon and squeezing the trigger in one, swift movement. A beam of burning yellow energy arched out and struck the construct dead-on; the beast howled in pain.

"Mordin!" Shepard shouted about the sound of her gun. "Get ready!"

"Ready, Shepard!"

Throwing herself back behind cover, Shepard listened as the salarian's tech attack scorched the hole she had left in the construct's armor. It howled again, and then shook the ground as its corpse toppled to the earth.

"_Defense towers are online," _EDI's voice reported through her comm link.

"Fire!"

The GARDIAN tower's guns came alive, firing at the Collector ship hovering over the colony. The vessel started to move, fast for its size, and managed to escape before the towers could inflict too much damage. Shepard ran in the ship's direction, squeezing off a few shots from her pistol in its direction though she knew it was pointless.

"_GODDAMNIT!" _she screamed.

Garrus and Mordin met up with her, the former gently grabbing her elbow.

"It's over, Shepard. There's nothing more we can do."

She sighed, frustrated, as she holstered her gun. "I know that! But…we were so close! Perhaps if we had gotten here just a bit sooner, we could have gotten those towers online faster and the colonists…"

"Foolish to dwell on 'ifs'," Mordin remarked. "Did what we could. Half of colony remains. Did well for limited scope of information to act on."

"Half isn't good enough," Shepard muttered beneath her breath, but didn't try to press the point any further.

"Commander Shepard…'Hero of the Citadel'…first human Spectre…defender of humanity."

The trio turned towards the new voice, Shepard's eyes widening in shock as Kaidan Alenko approached her. The Illusive Man had told her that he was stationed here, but she had never imagined they would meet again.

"Kaidan! I'm glad to see you're safe." They grabbed one another's wrists firmly in a soldier's greeting before stepping apart. Shepard was glad to see her old teammate alive, but it was strange that he seemed so…cold.

"What's wrong?" she asked hesitantly.

Kaidan watched her coolly, arms crossed over his chest. "I've been hearing some rumors about you, Shepard. Rumors that you're working for Cerberus."

"I died, Kaidan," she reminded him. "It took them two years, but Cerberus managed to bring me back. What kind of person would I be to spit in their faces after that?"

"You don't owe Cerberus anything! They are evil, Shepard! Think of how many of their operatives we killed during our hunt for Saren! And now you're working for them?" The coldness in his gaze sharpened, and Shepard willed him not to speak his next words. But the man had always been a stubborn bastard.

"Maybe it would've been better if you'd stayed dead," he spat. "At least then the world wouldn't have to see how far you've fallen."

Shepard lifted her arm to keep Garrus from charging the man, doing her best to keep her own calm. The turian obeyed, though he continued to glare at the human, his eyes on fire.

"If that's really how you feel," Shepard replied evenly, "then I'm sorry. I thought we had understood one another better. I can only assure you that I _do not _trust Cerberus, but they are the only ones not blinding themselves to the Reaper threat. If it takes my allegiance to them to help stop these colony abductions, then so be it."

Kaidan studied the ground for a long moment before finally lifting his eyes to hers once more. No apology there, but they were no longer so cold, either.

"I trust you, Shepard. But I can never trust them. Take care of yourself."

And with that he was gone. Between the physical and emotional planes, Horizon had taken its toll on the Commander. Sighing, she accessed her comm link.

"EDI, send down the shuttle. I'm sick of looking at this place."

Even with Kaidan and his thoughtless words looming over her head, Garrus managed to keep the Commander's spirits high as they continued to build their team. If nothing else could be said about working for Cerberus, they certainly let their people see a lot of exotic places. Garrus continued to offer his analysis:

"We already know that Tali is a strong addition. It'll be good to have her at our backs again.

"Samara's biotics will be indispensable to our fight. With that oath she swore to you, even more so.

"Thane…shouldn't be trusted."

Shepard almost found Garrus's adversity to Thane an amusing thing; it had to be the first time she had ever seen him so jealous. It was impossible for her to not find the drell incredibly alluring—especially with his lithe, muscular body rippling beneath those tight leathers—but Garrus's fears that she might run off with him were completely unfounded. Shepard wouldn't have waited so long to find her turian only to crush his heart in her hands now.

But his jealousy was quickly getting out of hand.

"_Um, Commander?" _Joker's voice said over the intercom in her cabin.

Shepard was sitting at her desk, poring over yet another batch of paperwork. It didn't seem to matter that she was a "hero" and no longer with the Alliance; there was _always _more paperwork to do. She sighed.

"What is it, Joker?"

"_Not to worry you or anything, but Garrus is picking a fight with Thane down in the mess. Dr. Chakwas is threatening to unleash some biologic weapon…I don't know if she's serious, but I really don't want to find out."_

Shepard rubbed at her temples; it didn't seem to matter what she said, the turian's instincts would always override her assurances. Damn males and their pride.

"I'll be down there in a minute. Tell the doc to hold on to her weapon."

"_Roger."_

It only took a few minutes for her to get to the elevator and ride it down to the third floor. As soon as the doors opened, she could hear voices raised in anger—one of them definitely belonging to the ship's elderly doctor.

"If you two don't back off and get back to your rooms, you _will _regret it!"

"Stay out of this, human," the drell's rasping voice warned. "The turian wishes to start a pointless fight, and I will oblige him."

"Pointless? You dare to mock me? You know damn well why I'm here!"

"Because of some imagined slight? You search for any excuse to fight, though you know it is a waste of time."

Shepard rounded the corner just as Garrus's legs tensed in preparation to pounce at the assassin.

"Stop this now!" she shouted in a voice full of authority, cheeks flushed in anger.

Garrus and Thane—along with the small crowd that had gathered to watch the fight—all turned towards her. Dr. Chakwas let out a gusty sigh.

"It's about bloody time!"

"Shepard, I—" Garrus tried to find a quick explanation, but the argument died on his tongue as she raked him with a withering glare before looking over at the drell.

"Thane," she began, a bit more calmly, "I apologize for my comrade's callousness. Were you injured in any fashion?"

"No, Shepard. I am fine."

"Good. Then if you'll excuse me…" Her angry gaze was back on Garrus, and he looked down, ashamed. Crooking her finger at him, Shepard stormed towards his station at the Main Battery, Garrus only a few steps behind. Once the door at the end of the hall had closed behind the pair, Dr. Chakwas turned to the rest of the gathered crew who were waiting to see what would happen next.

"Don't you all have jobs? Get back to work!"

Garrus watched Shepard's back, wondering just how angry she really was. He hadn't meant to get so worked up…but for some reason, just seeing Thane's face sent him flying off into a jealous rage. Garrus had just been sitting down to a lunch when the drell appeared—even had the nerve to sit next to him! And then Thane had had the gall to begin asking him questions about their Commander, starting off simply and then getting just a bit too personal for Garrus's tastes. Before he knew it, he was throwing his tray across the room and trying to get his hands around Thane's throat. Perhaps he had taken it a bit far…

Shepard finally turned around, her eyes locked on his. Garrus started to speak, only to be silenced as her fist connected solidly with his jaw. The force of the blow sent him stumbling backwards until his back hit the wall. Pain throbbed in the left side of his face—she had at least enough self-control not to strike the side of his mug already falling apart. Garrus lifted a hand to the growing bruise, gaping at her.

"You _idiot!" _she hissed, ignoring the pain in her hand. "What were you thinking?"

"He wouldn't stop asking questions about you! Things that he had no right thinking about!"

"Let people think what they want! Do you really believe something so asinine could affect me after everything that's happened? Tell me what this is really about. Now."

For the first time in two years, Garrus found himself fumbling for words. He felt foolish for his jealousy, and had no desire to confess the fact to her. But as he stood there, wilting beneath her intense glare, Garrus relented.

"Shepard…I've waited a long time to be with you. When you died, I…I lost myself. I abandoned everything I once knew and headed off to a life of a vigilante, doing everything possible to get myself killed, now that I think of it. I managed to get three separate mercenary crews vying for my head. When you showed up, running to my rescue…I thought you were a ghost. I truly believed that I had gone insane or that you had come to take me to my death.

"But when I realized that you were real, that I was alive… I can't lose you again, Shepard. I won't survive it this time."

"And you think you'll lose me to Thane?"

Not looking her in the eye, he nodded. Shepard sighed. She could understand his fears—the same thought had entered her mind from time to time—but it hurt her that he believed her feelings to be so fickle. It was that more than his insubordination that had angered her.

"Garrus…tell me what happened."

He looked up at her, confused.

"Tell me what happened…on Omega. Tell me where you went while I was dead."

Garrus turned away, tension stiffening every muscle in his body. Of all the things she could have asked of him, this hadn't been what he expected. Thinking back on his team, on the brave men he had failed, only brought back more pain that he wasn't sure how to handle. Other than getting even with the bastard who had betrayed them all. Garrus had told her about Sidonis, but that was the extent of it. Thinking of Sidonis brought only anger, which was so much better than the agony.

"Don't push me away," Shepard's voice said just behind him. Her hands rested on his arms, making his skin tingle even beneath his armor. "How can I help you if you never let me in?"

With a shuddering sigh, Garrus began talking. The names of each of his old teammates passed by his lips, striking at his heart. But with Shepard there to absorb each one—to understand how he felt—the pain wasn't so bad.


	7. Chapter 7

Author's Note: I did my best to replicate the Paragon version of Garrus's companion mission. I know I didn't get all of the words right, but you get the general idea.

Seven

They were in a shuttle gliding across the airways of the Citadel in the direction of the place Harkin had gotten Sidonis to meet them. Garrus's palms felt sweaty as he gripped the sniper rifle in his lap. After all this time, he would finally have his revenge. Sidonis had much to answer for, and Garrus would make sure that he suffered for each life that had been lost.

Shepard sat in the shuttle beside him, easily steering the craft through the "alleys" of the Citadel, away from traffic. Occasionally, she would glance over at him with a look of worry on her face. Garrus knew what she was thinking—they had gone through all the arguments before—but still he couldn't bring himself to agree with her. Sidonis had to die; that was that.

"You can drop me off right there," he said, pointing to an open space. "There's a good vantage point just above that I can use as my sniper's roost."

Shepard obeyed, bringing the shuttle to a stop in his designated spot. But as he moved to leave the cab, she gently grabbed his arm.

"Garrus, are you sure about this? It doesn't need to end this way."

He shook her off. "Yes, it does. Sidonis took everything away, and he must die for that."

"There could be something more to this, some reason why—"

"No reason is good enough for what he did!" Garrus's voice was harsh, but he couldn't help it. "I don't need you to agree with me, Shepard. But I do need your help. Please…just do this for me."

The look in her eyes was less than convinced, but she nodded all the same. Grateful, Garrus stepped away from the shuttle, watching as it hovered away to a location closer to where they were supposed to meet Sidonis. A part of him hated to ask her to do this, but Garrus knew that it had to be done if he was ever going to find peace. The souls of his team were clamoring for revenge.

Shepard parked the shuttle and stepped out, looking around the bustling walkway for her target. She spotted a turian seated on a bench nearby; Garrus affirmed his identity over her comm.

"_That's him. Keep him talking and when I give the word, move out of the way."_

This didn't seem right to her; Shepard knew that Garrus thought this was the only solution, but she had to know the truth. The only way she would get that truth was to speak with Sidonis, feel him out. If he was really the cold, remorseless traitor that Garrus had described, then she would move; if not…

Shepard waved the turian over. Warily, Sidonis stood and approached her.

"What's this all about?" he asked nervously.

"We think your cover has been compromised," she replied, acting the part.

"Shit. I knew this was a bad idea…"

"_All right, Shepard. I've got the shot. Move!"_

She disobeyed, making sure that she stood right in front of the turian.

"_Shepard, what are you—"_

"Look, your life is in danger, and if you don't start talking my friend will kill you."

"What are you talking about? What friend?"

"Garrus Vakarian has been looking for you, and unless you tell me exactly what you did to betray him, your life is forfeit."

Sidonis looked around nervously. "I-I have to go!"

Shepard quickly dodged in front of the turian as he tried to move, grabbing his arm to hold him still.

"_Don't move," _she hissed. "One more inch and you're dead. Tell me what I want to know and you may walk away from this alive. Why did you betray your team?"

"_Shepard, this is pointless. Just move out of the way!"_

She ignored Garrus, watching Sidonis sternly. The turian was studying his hands, his thoughts far away. When he finally spoke, it was in a low, haunted voice:

"I didn't know what to do… They threatened to kill me if I didn't do it. I had no choice!"

"_There's always another choice!"_

"I haven't slept in a year…food tastes like ash…nothing can slake my thirst…" Sidonis leaned up against a low concrete wall, sorrow emanating from him in dark waves. Shepard made sure that she still blocked him, just in case. "I can never forgive myself for what I did…and I don't blame Garrus for wanting to kill me."

"Look at him, Garrus," Shepard murmured into her comm link. "He's not alive. There's nothing here for you to kill."

There was a long silence on the other end of the line. Carefully, Shepard took a step to the side of Sidonis, leaving the turian open. When no shot came, she breathed a sigh of relief.

"_Fine. Just tell him…tell him to get out of here."_

"He's giving you a second chance, Sidonis. I suggest you use it wisely."

"I'll make it up to you, somehow, Garrus." Sidonis looked at Shepard, a mixture of relief and pain in his eyes. "I promise."

As Shepard brought the shuttle back down to pick Garrus up, she prepared herself for the worst. She had no doubt that he would be angry; she expected him to explode at her. So it was that he surprised her by climbing into the passenger's seat without a word, tense but seemingly under control.

"I know you want to talk about this," he started, "but I don't. Not now."

"I think it was for the best, Garrus."

"Maybe. I don't know. I'm used to looking at the world in black and white…gray…I don't know what to do with gray."

Shepard laid a gentle hand on his arm. "Everything is gray, Garrus. It's just a matter of figuring out which shades are a bit lighter."

He nodded, but didn't press the issue any further. Shepard felt her heart ache at the brokenness in his eyes. Then a spontaneous idea hit her—something she hoped would cheer him up. Using the seat controls on her side of the cab, she moved his chair back as far as it would go. Garrus looked up at her, confused.

"What are you doing?"

"Making it up to you."

It took some maneuvering, but Shepard managed to loosen the plates of her armor, stripping off the more constricting pieces. Garrus watched her, mouth agape. She winked at him.

"You just gonna sit there and stare, or are you gonna strip it for me?"

Garrus wasn't sure if she would ever be able to top that line in his list of "extreme turn-ons." As he fumbled with the clasps of his own armor, Shepard quickly made sure the shuttle's doors were locked and the windows tinted as far as they would go. No need for an unwanted audience. That done, she began removing the tight boxers she wore under her armor. By the time she was ready, Garrus's lower half was also bare—his blue cock out and very ready. He distantly thought about the fact that they had no condom, but decided that they would deal with the repercussions later.

Hunching over so she wouldn't hit her head on the ceiling, Shepard moved over to straddle his waist, lining up the entrance of her quickly moistening core with the tip of his penis. Garrus wrapped his hands around her hips to steady her, loving the way she looked hovering above him like that. He only wished that her chest was bare, too, so he could watch her soft breasts bounce when the action started.

Shepard ran her tongue up the side of his neck before impaling herself on his length. They gasped in unison, heads back as they paused a moment, sharing in the incredible feeling of Garrus's cock slowly expanding inside of her moist heat. When she began to move, he nearly lost it. But years in the turian military had taught him self-control, and he forced his body to hold back as he thrust his hips up every time she came down.

It was frantic and hard, cramped and a bit suffocating, but hot. Garrus loved her without reservation, and he wanted a thousand days like this alone with her. He caught her eyes as she rode him, and the hunger in that gaze made him groan and pick up the pace. Shepard bit off a cry of pleasure, burying her face in his neck as he thrust up into her with abandon.

"Shepard…I…." Garrus dug the tips of his talons into her sides, nearing the end.

She pressed her lips to his mouth and he pressed his tongue into hers, reveling in the way she moaned against him. Garrus's prehensile tongue wrapped itself around hers, stroking the muscle. The sensation was too much; with a muffled cry, she came. The feeling of her thighs applying pressure—her vaginal walls pulling his cock even further in—drew Garrus over the edge with her. His tongue untangled itself from hers as his head fell back against the seat cushion, teeth clenched against a rumbling growl.

Shepard slumped down against him, not ready to release him just yet. Content, she rested her cheek on his shoulder, arms curled around his neck. Garrus's hands stroked her sides subconsciously, the tips of his talons tickling her flesh.

"Better?" she murmured.

Garrus chuckled. "Much." He nibbled at her earlobe. "But I think your spontaneity might do me in."

She pulled back a bit to look him in the eye, eyebrow arched. "Is that a complaint?"

Laughing, Garrus moved his cock—which was already starting to harden again—inside her. Shepard gasped and dug her nails into the carapace covering his shoulders. She looked down at him in mock-outrage, which only made him laugh more.

"Never, Shepard. _Never."_


	8. Chapter 8

Eight

Things were quickly coming to a boil. Shepard did everything she could to build her team up—even going as far as reactivating a geth and accepting it into their crew—and help them to tie up any loose ends. It was a given that they might not survive this mission and she wanted to make sure that everyone's focus was on what they had to do, not what they had forgotten.

Garrus watched as Shepard threw herself into dangerous situations for her crew, heedless of her own life. Helping Samara was the worst; they nearly fought over the asari's plan for Shepard to meet an Ardat-Yakshi alone and unprotected. But no matter what he said, Shepard did what she wanted, and Garrus finally gave up on trying to stop her and did all he could to make sure that he was always by her side.

But it worried him still, because Shepard was giving everyone else closure, but didn't seem to think on what she needed to do for herself. Garrus brought the subject up casually one night as they lay entwined on her bed, and Shepard had just snuggled closer and said that she had all she wanted. But Garrus was determined to do something for her, no matter how simple. She deserved something nice and relaxing, at least—far away from the gunfire and the looming specter of the Omega 4 relay.

He was mulling over the idea as he headed into the cockpit, trying to think of somewhere pleasant and out-of-the-way where they could enjoy some time together and the crew could take a breather with some shore leave. Garrus wasn't completely comfortable with their relationship being in the open, but it was a small ship and he knew that Joker—being Joker—would know everything anyways. Hell, the impish pilot had probably listened in on them more than once.

"Joker, I need some advice."

The human turned his chair to regard the turian, a wolfish glint coming into his eyes.

"I'm sorry, buddy, but I can't help you with figuring out the Commander's G-spots. I'd be surprised if that woman even had any."

Garrus blushed at the man's blatant revelation—his mind distantly thinking of her arching and screaming beneath his touch—and fought back the urge to hit the smug human. Joker was just being himself, and there was no amount of broken bones that could change him now.

"Thanks, but that's not quite the advice I was looking for."

"Oh? Well, then I'm intrigued."

"I think Shepard needs a, uh…vacation. Y'know, before the shitstorm hits."

Joker stared at him. At some point, EDI had made her appearance, and even she seemed to be staring at him. The unblinking scrutiny was beginning to make Garrus feel uncomfortable.

"You think it's a bad idea?"

"Well…no. I just can't imagine the Commander taking a vacation. She always seems so content on the ship."

"I know. Shepard would never admit that she's overworked, and that's what worries me. She needs some time to take her mind off of everything that's coming."

"The psychological mindset of a human in Shepard's position is prone to stress," EDI remarked. "I think Mr. Vakarian's idea is sound."

"Great, so we're all in agreement." Joker rolled his eyes at the AI. "But if you were already decided, then what do you need my advice for?"

"Well…I wasn't sure where to go. C-Sec doesn't exactly train its officers on good vacation spots."

An almost evil glint came into the pilot's eyes. "Oh yeah, I know of a _real _good place…"

"No strip clubs," Garrus warned.

"Cool your jets, bud. It's a big tourist spot complete with romantic views and all that bullshit…and a few fun places down the boulevard…" The last he said under his breath. Garrus glared at him.

"Hey, now! I know you're doing this for Shepard, but you've gotta think about the rest of the crew too! Especially me!"

Sighing, the turian shook his head. "Very well. But if we get there and it's a giant 'red-light district' planet, I _will _break your bones."

"Noted."

"Thanks, Joker. I'm going to go get the crew together for a little party down in the mess…try to keep Shepard occupied. Not a word, you hear?"

"Sir, yes sir!" the pilot gave him a mock salute as Garrus headed back down the hall.

Shepard was sitting at her desk, looking through some encrypted messages that had come in from the Illusive Man. Even in a simple letter, he sounded smug. How she wanted to take one of those damn cigarettes and shove it up—

The ship lurched forward suddenly as its FTL drives were engaged. Well, now that was odd. Normally Joker waited for her to give the order before they headed anywhere. If this was his idea, then something was bound to go wrong. Stretching out a few knotted muscles in her shoulders, Shepard rose to her feet and headed to the door. Best to diffuse the situation now before it got completely out of hand.

When the elevator doors slid open, she came face-to-chest with Garrus. Shepard craned her head back to look up at him, one eyebrow cocked in question.

"Any idea what's going on?"

"Nothing you need to worry about. Now come on, we don't want to keep your guests waiting."

"'My guests'? Did I miss something?"

Garrus silenced her by leaning down and running his tongue along the smooth flesh of her throat. She shuddered, clutching at his arms. Shepard started to pull him closer, but Garrus quickly backed away. Growling, she glared up at him hotly.

"Tired already?" she purred, running her fingers over his jaw. A quiver ran down his spine, and Garrus quickly removed her hand before he lost control and pushed her back into the cabin.

"No, no. But we've got to get downstairs."

"Mmm…that's exactly what I was thinking…"

Garrus groaned. _Spirits, _she was too damn sexy. "Please, Shepard…humor me while I can still think straight."

She sighed gustily but obligingly relinquished her attack. "Fine. Lead the way!"

The elevator reached the third floor, the doors sliding open. Shepard led the way around the corner into the mess hall where she was confronted by the entirety of the _Normandy's _crew. Her recruited aliens and the Cerberus humans all gathered around, cheering as she entered the room.

"_Shepard!" _they cried, raising all sizes and colors of drinks in the air.

The warmth that emanated from her crew touched Shepard deeply; in that moment, she loved each and every one of them with every fiber of her heart. And in the same sweep of emotions, she hated herself for having to take them on such a hopeless mission.

Sensing her sudden change in mood, Garrus quickly swept her over to the kitchen where Rupert had managed to transform his counter into a makeshift bar.

"The strongest you've got, Rupert!" he ordered, and the mess Sergeant laughed as he obeyed.

Shepard denied the shot of dark liquor that he offered. "No, no. Something simple, if you don't mind."

Suddenly Grunt was at the "bar" next to her, leaning over as he hissed hot, krogan breath across her face. "What's the matter, Battlemaster? Not strong enough to handle your alcohol?"

She snorted. "I can drink you under the table any day, big boy."

Amusement flared in his eyes. "That a challenge?"

The rest of the crew began to cheer with renewed vigor, egging their Commander on. Shepard looked around at their faces, trying to seem as if she were surprised they had all betrayed her, but failing as her lips curled into a smile.

"Don't take that shit from the giant lizard!" Jack roared as she sloshed her own, blue-tinted beverage. "Drink!"

Samara and Thane were the only quiet ones in the room, though even they were smiling as they sipped at their own—most likely non-alcoholic—drinks. Even Garrus laughed with the others, eyes sparkling as he wondered what she would do. During their hunt for Saren, Shepard had rarely indulged due to strict Alliance command; but the Alliance was no longer here, and Cerberus was far less constricting about what its "employees" chose to do in their down time on the ship. It would be fun to watch Shepard let her hair down and join the rest of them in the plane of normalcy.

Locking gazes with Grunt once more, Shepard twisted her lips into a feral smile. "You're on!"

There was a roar of approval, and then the pair was being herded over to a table, seated across one another as a few of the more helpful crew began filling shot glasses. Shepard looked down at the green liquid quizzically.

"Um, what is this?"

"A special asari brew," Rupert explained. "Strong enough in its own right, and not half bad. I could always use a krogan brew if ya'd like."

Shepard shuddered. "No, this will do just fine." She knew what krogan alcohols could do to a non-krogan biological structure…

Raising their glasses in a salute, the pair downed the first shot. Shepard hissed as the liquor burned its way down her throat; but, as Rupert had said, it wasn't unpleasant. Almost sweet. A second pair of shots was poured and they continued.

Joker had joined the party after the pair had finished their ninth shots, and the look on his face as Shepard greeted him in an overly-enthusiastic manner was priceless.

"Joker! Tells ush a joke! He'sh sho funny, didjakno?" she informed the others, bursting into uncontrollable laughter a moment later.

"Youshud keepsh yer head…in game!" Grunt warned, and then looked around in confusion as the crew joined in her laughter. Even Thane couldn't help but chuckle; the sound of a drunk krogan was rather amusing, after all.

Grunt finally won the contest, but just barely. After her twenty-first shot, Shepard slurred something crude about varren and then passed out; one more shot and he followed suit. Garrus had moved in quickly to gather the woman in his arms before the press of drunken bodies stole her away, leaving the tank-bred, several-ton krogan for someone else to clean up.

As he rode the elevator back up to Shepard's cabin, the woman snoring softly in his arms, Garrus smiled. Her head would hurt in the morning, but luckily Mordin had given him some pills that would take away the major effects of the hangover. All that mattered was that Shepard had seemed to enjoy herself—and it was the first time any of them had ever seen their commanding officer drunk, which was always fun.

Garrus stepped into her room and gently laid Shepard face-down on the bed, making sure that she wouldn't suffocate. He then moved a metal pail within easy reach, just in case. Carefully, he stripped her down to her underclothes, fighting back his growing erection.

"Just making her comfortable," he muttered, assuring himself that his intentions were pure.

Carefully tucked in and asleep, Garrus looked down at his best friend and lover. Even in a drunken stupor, she was beautiful to him. He wanted to lie down next to her, but decided against it. She needed a good night's rest before tomorrow's events, and his presence might prevent that. Garrus started to step away, when Shepard's hand shot out and grasped at the fabric of his shirt.

"Don't go…" she murmured, eyes fluttering open for a moment before closing once more.

Garrus smiled. He settled down in the bed next to her, gently lifting her up so that he could wrap his arm around her waist.

"As you wish."


	9. Chapter 9

Author's Note: I made up the name of the planet. Looked through a big database of the planets, and got really sick of reading about all the uninhabitable rocks and big gas giants. So just go with it!

Nine

Shepard awoke to a throbbing pain in her head and a nauseous feeling in her stomach. With a groan, she rolled to the side of the bed, waiting until her stomach stopped rolling.

"Here, take these."

Garrus's taloned hands appeared in front of her face, one holding a glass of water the other three little orange pills. Not even bothering to ask what the drugs were, Shepard downed them as quickly as she could. The pills didn't take long to start working; within a few minutes, her head began to clear and her stomach felt a bit more stable. Sighing gratefully, she rolled over onto her back so she could look up at her turian. Garrus smiled and leaned over her, pressing his mouth to hers as softly as he could. His tongue gently slid over her lips, starting Shepard's body into quivering. She tried to reach up and pull him down with her, but Garrus moved back a step, smiling devilishly.

"Hung-over, and still trying to jump me? You're incorrigible, Shepard."

She pouted. "And you're mean! This is twice now you've denied me…don't think I won't get back at you for this."

"I have no doubt of that. But hold off just a little longer. I have a surprise for you…"

Shepard groaned as Garrus headed towards her closet. "The last time you said something like that, I woke up like this!"

Laughing, he drew a long dress out of the closet and laid it on the bed in front of her. Shepard stared down at the beautiful garment, awed but confused. The fabric was a deep, emerald green and soft as silk to the touch. Shepard found that she couldn't stop running her hands over it. There were little embroidered designs all over it, though she couldn't quite tell what they were. Almost like…words, maybe…

"Turian lettering," Garrus explained softly. "It's…strange, but I hoped you would like it."

"I love it, but…" Shepard drew her hand back, as if suddenly afraid to touch it; to dirty it. "I don't think me wearing a dress is going to drive the right amount of fear into the Collectors."

_Such pretty things weren't meant for someone like me. I'm a warrior, not a lady._

Garrus drew Shepard to her feet, holding her against his chest. "Won't you wear it? Just once? I know it'll look great on you."

She chuckled. "Yeah, sure. Where did you get this thing, anyways? I wasn't aware there was a mail-order system that hunted down traveling ships."

"I picked it up the last time we stopped at the Citadel. You were helping Thane find his son, and I took the time to stop by a little shop I know."

Shepard quirked an eyebrow suspiciously. "Oh? A dress shop that you know? Should I be angry, or worried?"

Realizing his mistake, Garrus blanched. "T-That's not what I meant! I, uh, um, you see—"

Shepard silenced him with a quick kiss, her eyes laughing. "I was kidding. Thank you for the gift. But I still don't understand why you want me to wear it. Unless…this is some kind of weird sex game you came up with?"

A low growl rose in Garrus's throat at the images that assaulted him then. He reached out to grab at her hips, and it was Shepard's turn to dance away, giggling. She waggled a finger at him.

"Ah, ah! I thought we had to wait?"

This human would be the death of him, Garrus was certain. But she was right. It was already early afternoon, and if he wanted to fulfill his plan, they would have to get moving.

"Ok, get dressed and I'll meet you down in the CIC."

Shepard paled. "Walk around…in _this?_ But…what if the crew sees me? W-We're on a mission!"

"Don't worry about it. Most of the crew is still passed out, and those who aren't are off the ship already."

"Off the ship? Wait, where are we?"

Garrus's mandibles flared in what could only be a smirk. "Just get dressed and leave the rest to me. One day of shore leave isn't going to hurt anything."

Before she could argue further, the turian was on the elevator and headed down to his own quarters. Shepard shook her head, turning her attention back to the beautiful dress. It had been so long since she'd put on something so delicate, Shepard wondered if she would even be able to force her muscular body into the finely-knit seams. Most likely they would all just rip open and she would walk around looking like the Hulk.

She sighed. It made her uncomfortable to even think about wearing such a thing, but Garrus had asked her so nicely. And she knew it would make him happy if she wore it. _Time to girl up, _Shepard told herself. _But first, a shower._

Half an hour later, Shepard was on the elevator, waiting for it to hit down at the CIC. She couldn't keep her cheeks from burning; the dress had fit her perfectly, but it was still strange to feel so…free. Shepard only hoped that Garrus wasn't lying and that there really were few people left on the ship; it would be even better if there was no one left. Being seen like this by anyone—especially someone like Jack or Grunt—would be too much to bear.

But sure enough, as the elevator doors slid open, her entire team was waiting in the lobby beyond. Jack took one look at her and began laughing; Tali shoved her, and the woman fell to the ground, still laughing. Shepard resisted the urge to bury her burning face in her hands, instead planting her hands on her hips as she tried to look tough.

"I fail to see what's so funny!"

"Y-you…dress…ahahaha!" Jack continued to roll on the ground; the others were smiling, too, except for Grunt who looked as if someone had just ripped out one of his hearts.

"Battlemaster…this isn't right! How are you supposed to fight in something so…frilly?"

Shepard rolled her eyes. "Exactly what I said."

"All right guys! Time to disperse!"

They all turned to where Joker hobbled up, dressed in a casual suit that actually made him look a little handsome. He'd even taken off his hat and combed back his brunette hair. The pilot took a moment to appraise Shepard's appearance before turning towards the male members of the group and grinning evilly.

"You guys ready? I found the perfect spot."

"I'm not so sure that going anywhere with you will be a good idea," Thane remarked. "Perhaps I will just return to my room—"

"Nuh-uh. If I have to get dragged into this crap, you're suffering too." Grunt turned the drell back around and the men shuffled off the ship.

Kelly stood with the women, waving to Shepard as she gathered them and left as well. Samara didn't look very thrilled, but allowed herself to be dragged off, leaving the Commander alone on the command deck. She looked around, confused. Where was Garrus?

As if on cue, the elevator doors slid open and strong, turian arms wrapped around her waist, pulling her back against a firm chest. Shepard sighed contentedly and leaned back into the warm embrace. When he finally released her, she turned around to appraise his outfit: the equivalent of a tuxedo, only built for a turian structure. Smooth black cloth with a dark blue under shirt. The colors matched him well, bringing out the darker hues of his eyes.

As Shepard inspected him, Garrus inspected her in turn, his breath hitching. He had thought that the green would bring out the beautiful color of her eyes, and he had been more than right. Shepard's eyes shone line jewels, her hair slightly curled as it draped over her shoulders. She wore no make-up, but it didn't matter; she was still beautiful. The dress hugged her athletic curves snugly, reaching down just below her knees so that her shapely calves were bare—except for the pistol strapped to her ankle, which made him chuckle. A cut in the left side of the dress reached all the way up to a few inches from her hip, revealing even more smooth, pale flesh. Garrus had known this dress would be perfect for her, and he was glad that he had been right.

Garrus bowed forward slightly, offering her his arm. "Shall we, my lady?"

Cheeks still burning, Shepard managed a crooked grin as she slipped her arm into the crook of his elbow. The things she did for her crazy turian…

They were on the planet Debaas in the Crescent Nebula, on the colony Hras Anna. Stepping off the _Normandy _and heading into the landing bay, Shepard was surprised at how many different species she saw milling about. It was an asari colony, but there were plenty of human, turian, salarian, and even batarian faces in the crowds, too. She kept expecting people to stare at them—xenophobes—but realized that they weren't the only inter-species couple. Mostly there were different species with beautiful asari hanging off their arms, but Shepard noticed a few turian-human pairings, too.

Garrus watched her gaze around, smiling at the look of awe on her face. He was a little surprised himself by all the intermingling, but then it wouldn't have mattered if no one else agreed. Nothing could make him let go of her arm.

They started their afternoon by walking down the promenade, looking at all the little shops along the way. Mostly, they joked about the frivolous junk that was the new "Must have!" object of the year. When they passed by a weapons shop, the pair spent a good hour just drooling over the guns. Shepard's eye caught on a new SMG model while Garrus looked through a line of sniper rifles, testing the scopes. When he realized that he was doing exactly the opposite of his intentions for the night, Garrus gathered Shepard and left the shop—though he had to practically drag her out.

"But—but! The shiny!"

It was thoroughly amusing to watch a woman dressed like Shepard begging like a child. Several passersby watched them with raised brows, snickering behind their hands. Garrus finally managed to keep her moving, though the despondent look on her face made him feel like laughing.

Moving closer to the downtown area, they spotted Thane leaning against the entrance of a building, head bowed and eyes closed. Curious, they paused in front of him.

"Thane? What are you doing out here? I thought you were hanging out with Joker and the others?"

The drell glanced up at her, a tormented look in his eyes. "Yes, well, that didn't work out."

He pointed up, and Shepard finally noticed the glowing neon sign above the door in the shape of a naked asari. She threw back her head and began to laugh, sympathetically patting the poor man on his shoulder.

"Aw, loosen up, bud! You never know…it could be enjoyable!"

Thane smirked at her. "Perhaps. But I think I'll stay out here for now."

Shepard shrugged. "Suit yourself. See you back on the ship!"

Garrus nodded at Thane, who returned the gesture, and then Shepard's arm was back in his and they were walking once more. A little while later, they found themselves seated at a little table in a fancy restaurant. Asari waitresses flitted about in their skimpy outfits, taking the couple's order. A bottle of fine green wine was brought over first, and after a while their meals arrived. Shepard went all out with a steak smothered in a garlic sauce and mushrooms with a side of steamed asparagus. It wasn't often that she got to eat good food, and so she allowed herself the moment to pig out. Looking over at Garrus's food, she cocked her head to the side in confusion. There were so many bright colors on his plate, and even though it looked sweet, the smell wafting off it gave the sense of something spicy.

"What are you eating?" he asked, giving her plate the same strange look.

"Steak. Rare and delicious." She licked her lips. At his persistent, confused look, she continued: "Back on Earth, we have these creatures called cows that you can kill and eat. All kinds of foods are made from them." She nodded at his plate. "And, uh…what's that?"

"Some native flora and fauna species from Palaven. Kind of the same as your cow, I guess."

They smiled at each other and began eating. Shepard tried to be ladylike—partly so she wouldn't ruin her dress and partly so Garrus wouldn't think her an animal—but it was hard to eat slowly after years of military service where you ate when you could. Food was food, no matter how ugly or pretty it looked, and she had spent too many nights hungry because rations were low. And so, after a few tries at small, delicate bites, Shepard gave up and began shoving heaping helpings of steak in her mouth, chewing and savoring the juices with relish. Garrus chuckled and joined her, scooping a large mouthful of blue meat into his mouth. They shared another smile in between bites, heedless of the disgusted looks the restaurant's other patrons shot in their direction.

With the meal devoured and the plates cleared away, Garrus pulled a small box out of his pocket. Shepard paled; surely he wasn't…?

He caught her look and quickly shook his head. "No, no! Nothing like that, don't worry!" Garrus had studied enough about human culture to understand the significance of such a gift presented in this situation; too bad he hadn't thought of that earlier. Garrus placed the box on the table in front of her, waiting for Shepard to open it. Carefully, she lifted the box open on its hinges. What lay inside took her breath away.

A tiny flower with blue petals in the shape of a bell.

Shepard still remembered the tiny flower he had picked for her after the destruction Sovereign had wreaked on the Citadel; she remembered how it had been utterly destroyed in the attack that had taken the original _Normandy. _The sentiment had meant so much to her back then, and the fact that Garrus had remembered it—and had taken the time to pick her another—touched Shepard in such a profound way. She looked across the table at him, her eyes filling with tears.

Garrus panicked. "I'm sorry! I thought you would like it—"

"Shut up," she whispered, rising to her feet so that she could circle the table towards him. Gracefully, Shepard sat herself in his lap, wrapped her arms around his neck, and pressed her lips to his in a tender kiss. Garrus hugged her close, wishing the moment could last.


	10. Chapter 10

Ten

Shepard continued to allow Garrus to lead her about, not caring where they went so long as she could be close to him. They were walking down the promenade once more, her arm hooked in his, head resting against his bicep. It was getting late, and there was only one more place he wanted to take her. As they approached the entrance to a very expensive-looking hotel—the large glowing sign above denoting is as "THE MIRAGE"—Shepard looked up warily.

"Are we robbing the place? You know I don't do that anymore."

Garrus chuckled. "Now you've ruined all my plans." He paused so he could lean down and tickle the inside of her ear with the tip of his tongue. She giggled and playfully slapped him away. "I rented us a room in the honeymoon suite. I thought it might be nice to spend the night in…opulence."

"How did you afford this?"

"Don't worry about it. Let's just enjoy the night."

His tongue moved down to gently stroke her throat and all thought of further argument fled. There was only one thing Shepard needed right now, and it wouldn't matter if they ducked into an alley. But since the room was already booked, that was certainly the next best choice. Shepard lowered her hand to grip his firm turian ass, smirking as Garrus jumped. The low growl that meant he was turned on began rumbling in his chest, and he quickly rushed them through the fancy doorway.

They checked in with the beautiful asari receptionist and as soon as the doors of the elevator closed behind them, Garrus had her up against the wall, running his tongue over every inch of bare flesh the dress revealed. Shepard leaned her head back, raking her nails over his back while wishing she could rip his tux off. When the doors slid back open, Garrus lifted her into his arms and carried her bridal-style down the hall and over the threshold into their room—kicking the door closed behind him.

The Mirage's honeymoon suite came complete with a balcony overlooking the busy city, a fully equipped restroom (with a hot tub), plush carpeting that would feel quite soft against bare skin, and a giant bed covered with red silk sheets. It was truly the perfect sex palace.

Garrus gently laid Shepard on the bed, covering her with his body. His tongue was still working wonders on the sensitive areas of her throat, his teeth occasionally entering the picture, adding a little pain to intensify the pleasure. Shepard shivered as he began moving lower, nipping at the skin covering her collar bone, fingers pulling the edges of her dress lower. She reached behind her to the zipper keeping the offending garment on, and once it was undone, Garrus had the dress off and on the floor in one swift movement.

Shepard hadn't bothered wearing a bra with the dress, and so he was immediately greeted by her pert breasts. Garrus lowered his mouth to take her left nipple in his mouth, gently nibbling at it before running his tongue across her flesh to the right. Every feeling was indescribable, and Shepard was already quite wet. She wanted to rip off his pants and feel him inside her, but when she tried to reach for his clothes, Garrus pinned her wrists above her head on the bed. Shepard growled at him; Garrus just smiled up at her from his position at her breast, and the sight of him sucking on her was almost too much.

Garrus teased her nipples endlessly, loving the way it made his human moan and shift against the sheets as if she were on fire. All the times they had had sex, it had been a hot and heavy affair that normally went straight to him plowing into her mercilessly. This day was about Shepard, and there was no reason for the night to be any different. Garrus knew that she enjoyed their escapades—more often than not it was her jumping him and not the other way around—but he was determined to make sure that Shepard enjoyed herself thoroughly this night.

Once her breasts were sufficiently moist and red, Garrus continued to travel further down, still using his tongue to caress every inch of bare flesh along the way. He was forced to release her wrists as he delved down lower, but Garrus was confident that once he began, she wouldn't be able to interfere. He nestled his face in between her legs, gently nipping at the soft flesh of her thighs. Shepard groaned, moving slightly in an attempt to draw his attention to where she desired him most. Her panties were almost completely soaked through with how wet she was, and the more he teased her, the more desperate she became.

"Garrus…" she moaned, moving her hands behind his head and pressing down in an attempt to force his head to her throbbing center.

The turian grinned, tongue flashing out to lick her through the fabric of her underwear. Shepard groaned louder, grinding her hips into the bed.

"Garrus!"

He quickly removed her panties, returning his face to her wet lips. His tongue slowly ran across her entrance, and Shepard's hips bucked. Garrus then entered her, pushing his tongue in as far as it would go, twisting the prehensile appendage as he went. Shepard cried out in ecstasy, arching her back off the bed. Never before had she experienced such bliss; she had dreamed of that tongue being put to good use, but thinking and feeling were two _very _different understandings.

Garrus brought her over the edge, and even as her juices spilled over his tongue, he did not relent. He brought her to a climax three more times before finally straightening and removing his clothes, his blue cock free and hard. Garrus looked up at Shepard who laid back against the sheets, flushed and panting. Moving back up her body with another succession of nips and licks, Garrus finally reached her mouth once more. Shepard wrapped her hands around his neck and pulled him close, pressing her tongue inside his mouth so that she could taste herself on him.

Growling low in his throat, Garrus's hands moved her legs up onto his shoulders, positioning the tip of his cock at her moist, throbbing sex. They had stopped using condoms with help from a special drug Mordin had devised to mitigate any allergic reaction, and for that he was grateful. It was so much more satisfying to feel every crevice of her body against him with no "middle man" to steal the pleasure.

Shepard moaned as he slid into her, kneading her fingers against the thinner scales of his neck. Garrus was forced to use every ounce of willpower not to explode as soon as he entered her; he wanted this moment to last as long as possible.

But between Shepard's little cries and the way her body throbbed around his penis, it was too much. Garrus thrust into her with a frantic pace, reaching up to grasp one of her nipples in between two of his talons as he neared the edge. When he came, she joined him again. Spent, Garrus slumped forward, resting on his elbows to keep from crushing his human but not pulling out just yet. He savored the feeling of being inside her, and wasn't ready to relinquish it just yet. Shepard moved her hands down to cup his face, careful of the bandage on the right side. She traced her thumb over the visible cybernetics, wondering how much it still pained him.

Garrus captured her hand in his, nibbling at the pads of her fingers. Shepard shivered in delight. His blue eyes burned into her soul, and she could feel herself getting aroused again. Judging from the way that his cock began filling her once more, it was obvious that he, too, was ready for more.

No part of the room was left untouched. Garrus took her in the hot tub and the shower, even on the balcony where Shepard's cried echoed in the crisp air; he took her against the wall, let her ride him on the floor. No matter where they were, they were together, and every moment was bliss.

They ended up tangled together on the plush carpet, exhausted. Shepard had her head resting on Garrus's chest, letting the sound of his heartbeat soothe her aching body. They would be sore in the morning, but as far as either of them was concerned, it was completely worth it. Garrus ran his talons lightly up and down her side, smiling as she began to purr.

Shepard moved her leg—her foot coming in contact with the silky fabric of her dress. A sudden curiosity came over her, and she pulled it up into her grasp, tracing her fingers over the little embroidered symbols.

"What do these say?" she asked.

Garrus took the garment from her, studying the intricately woven words. It was an old form of the turian language, but no matter how bad a turian he was, Garrus still knew how to read it.

"This word says 'respect.' This one 'beauty.'"

Shepard watched him as he deciphered the little drawings. He rattled off a few more, including "strength" and "valor." She just listened, the soothing sound of his flanging voice and the heartbeat under her ear lulling her into a light sleep.

"And this word…" Garrus paused, running his talons over the embroidery. Shepard looked up at him, wondering why he hesitated. The words were simple enough, all endearments in favor of the wearer.

"This word means 'love.'"

A loaded word, indeed. There was no one else she enjoyed spending time with as much as him—sex or not—and there was no one's advice she valued more. Garrus was her rock, and even though he was a bit brash about certain things, Shepard had come to rely on him implicitly. But bringing a word like that into the equation… Well, the truth was that she did love him. Would admitting that to him chase him away?

"Shepard…" Garrus buried his face in her hair, inhaling her scent. He never would have thought it would be possible to feel so strongly for a human, but then here he was, and never before in his life had Garrus felt happier. The only time he felt whole was when she was with him, and there was nothing that he wouldn't do if only she asked. Garrus hadn't wanted to scare her off before and had kept the word out of his vocabulary. But now…why not? Would she have stayed with him if she didn't feel the same?

"I love you, Shepard."

His murmured confession wrenched at her heart. Loving people had never been an easy feat for her, especially growing up an orphan in the harsh alleys of Earth. But hearing that sentiment from him—seeing it mirrored in her own heart—made Shepard feel it was _right._

Shepard moved herself on top of him, straddling his hips as she leaned down to kiss him. When she pulled back, her eyes glowed down at him, brimming with tears.

"I love you, too."

With his arms holding her close, they fell asleep in blissful contentment.


	11. Chapter 11

Eleven

Soft sunlight filtered in the open balcony through Hras Anna's ecosystem stabilizers. The sun did little to illuminate too much or even add additional warmth, but it seeped enough light into the room that Garrus felt himself being stirred from sleep. Shepard's soft breath stroked against his neck, her body pressed close against his right side, her leg planted snugly between both of his. It was her favorite way to sleep whenever he joined her at night, and though Garrus had never been much of a "cuddler" with his partners in the past, he could no longer imagine waking up any other way.

Turning his head, Garrus looked down at his lover's face, at the peace that was only ever present when she was asleep. Even when she was with him, there was always a sense of duty and urgency about Shepard that made it seem impossible that she could ever relax. The weight of the world was forever upon her shoulders, but Garrus was glad that he had at least given her one night of bliss before the war began.

He pulled her closer with the hand wrapped around her waist, and buried his face in her hair. These were the moments that you always wished could last forever…but as soon as the desires are made known, are destined to end too soon.

"_Commander, do you copy?"_

All too soon…

Garrus loathed the act, but had no choice as he gently pulled away from her and moved to the nightstand beside their bed where the comm links sat. He picked up his display and snapped it on.

"What's up, Joker?"

"_Is the Commander still alive, you dog?"_

The turian rolled his eyes. "Of course she is. Where's the fire?"

"_Well, I'm afraid we might have a problem. Jack got a little…drunk last night and some shit happened. Miranda's pissed, and I think they plan on blowing the ship all to hell."_

"Can't you handle this yourselves?" he growled.

"_Uh, no. I make it a point _not _to get in the middle of a biotics war between two crazy women. That's the Commander's job." _There was a pause. _"Oh, what a wonderful job…"_

Garrus severed the link with a disgusted sigh. This was the whole reason that he had taken Shepard on this vacation in the first place, and these idiots couldn't even give her one last morning to sleep in and enjoy it.

"Garrus?"

He turned—and felt his body begin to burn. Shepard lay on her stomach, chin perched in her hands, legs up and feet kicking absently. Her breasts were pushed down into the plush pink carpet, her auburn hair a fuzzy mess. She watched him with half-lidded emerald eyes, kiss-bruised lips twisted in a tiny smile.

"Sounds like there's some fun waiting for us," Shepard remarked, her voice still heavy with sleep.

Garrus moved down to the floor so that he could draw her up for a kiss. "Let them destroy the ship," he murmured against her lips. "We can just stay here forever."

Shepard chuckled, gently licking at his mouth before pulling back. "If only we could." She patted his uninjured cheek. "Now soldier up, boy! It's time to get a move on."

Garrus groaned in despair, but obeyed as he rose to his feet. Shepard looked down at the dress in her hands, frowning. He chuckled and moved into the little closet, pulling out a very full bag.

"Here, just for you."

Shepard caught the bag, smiling as she unzipped it and her normal clothes were revealed. Garrus's armor was also in here, and she began unpacking for the both of them. But as she got to the bottom of the bag, she realized something was missing.

"You forgot my underwear," Shepard remarked.

"Did I now? Huh…"

She stared up at him, aghast. "You beast! Do you know how uncomfortable it is to bounce around in these clothes?"

Garrus's eyes were laughing, looking between her face and her breasts hungrily. Shepard threw her head back with a sound of despair. It wasn't fair that he could be a perfect gentleman one night, and then a horny bastard come morning! She hadn't worn a bra with her dress, and her panties from the night before were pretty much ruined, but Shepard would have to make do.

Deciding she needed to punish her turian, Shepard rose to her feet and turned just enough so that all he could see was the side of her right breast and the curve of her ass. Starting with the pants, she pulled them on slowly, making sure that she twisted a lot. Shepard glanced over her shoulder at him, grinning victoriously as she spotted his slack-jawed face. Garrus had started to pull his armor on, but now just stood there holding his left brace half-way on his arm. She repeated the process with her shirt, turning slightly so that he could no longer see her breasts as she wriggled the garment on. Shepard was being a terrible tease and she knew it, but _he _was the cheeky bastard who had started it!

"Shepard, you're evil." It was all Garrus could do to control the raging erection stretching at his pants.

"Then perhaps you should learn not to fuck with me." She winked at him, and he laughed.

They made it back to the ship with little mishap, save one human man who got a little too pushy. Garrus started to his lover's defense, but Shepard handled the idiot easily with a sharp right hook to the nose. After that, Garrus vowed never again to forget to pack her a bra. It might be amusing and sexy to watch her bounce freely in the fabric of her shirt, but that also meant that every other male's eye watched, too. Perhaps not other turians, since soft breasts weren't something they normally looked for, but definitely humans and asari.

When they arrived at the ship, much of their human crew waited outside on the landing dock, passing around a pitcher of coffee as they chatted. Spotting Shepard, Gabby, the engineer, trotted over to meet them.

"Glad you're back, Commander." She looked up at Garrus nervously before continuing, "Jack and Miranda are tearing apart the lower decks. We all decided it would be best to just stay out of the way."

Shepard sighed. "Any idea how this started?"

Gabby blushed. "Um…well…"

"Oh, aye, I know!" Kenneth—Gabby's partner in crime—said as he joined them. "Jack managed to slip somethin' into Miranda's drink, and then the two got a wee bit drunk. Next thing I know, the pair are leavin' the bar together lookin' all lovey-dovey." He winked lewdly as Gabby's blush deepened.

Shepard lowered her face into her hands, feeling the intense desire to kill someone. She should have known better than to leave her volatile crew unsupervised. Especially Jack. The next thing they would tell her would be that Grunt was somehow involved, and that now the entire Engineering deck was a shambles.

"All right, I'll take care of it. It would probably be best if you guys stayed out here until I get everything resolved."

"Ye don't have to tell me twice, Commander," Kenneth replied. "I mean, as much fun as it is to have me own personal fantasy come to life, I'd rather not die over it."

"Huh, you finally say something smart," Gabby remarked.

"Ah, but ye always underestimate me, love." 

Gabby rolled her eyes as she steered her partner away, opening a path for Shepard and Garrus to enter the ship. As they stood in the airlock, Garrus wrapped his arms around her waist and pulled her back against his chest. He breathed against the back of her neck, sending little shivers up and down her spine.

"Don't think for a second that last night was a mistake," he murmured. "You deserve some fun and relaxation, Shepard. They might be your crew, but you're not their mother. Sooner or later, those two are going to have to learn to grow up."

She leaned into him and smiled softly. He was right, of course. It was hard to accept some days, especially considering the fact that so many of her crew were unstable and she had taken it upon herself to level them out a bit, but he was right. Shepard turned in his arms so that she could look him in the eye.

"I regret nothing, and don't you ever think I will lament the time we spend together. Each and every moment is precious to me, and there is no one else in this universe I can honestly say the same about. I love you, Garrus."

He drew her closer, burying his face against her shoulder. "I love you, Shepard. More than life itself."

When the elevator doors opened onto the engineering deck, Shepard was surprised to see the rest of her non-human crew—and Jacob—milling about the hall. They looked up at her and Garrus when they arrived, several eyebrows raised in silent question. Shepard raised her own brow back at them in retort, and there were smiles and rolling eyes all around.

"Suggest you diffuse situation quickly, Commander," Mordin spoke up. "Heightened emotional state of human females can be dangerous. No offense intended."

Shepard shook her head, chuckling. "None taken. I suggest you all keep a wide berth while I attempt to fix this."

Garrus tried to follow her as she headed below decks, but a stern glance from those emerald eyes forced him to stay put. He leaned against the wall near Grunt, watching the door with worry. The krogan looked over at him, blue eyes hard.

"Turian."

Garrus looked at him.

Grunt regarded him not with his usual hostility, but rather a cold air of respect.

"My Battlemaster accepts you, and that is enough for me. But I swear…harm her, and I will rip your ugly turian head off."

The protective tone in the krogan's voice shocked Garrus. He had never thought Grunt's species capable of such strong feelings for someone outside their race, but here Grunt stood, threatening him like a caring older brother. Smiling, Garrus patted the krogan's thick, armored shoulder.

"You never need worry about that. I would sooner cut my own heart out than hurt her."

Grunt nodded, satisfied. Looking around at the rest of the crew, Garrus saw the same sentiment mirrored in the eyes of the others. It touched him in a way he hadn't thought possible. Garrus wondered if Shepard knew just how devoted these people were to her, how much they respected and loved her just for being who she was. Truly, he was blessed to be the one closest to her heart.

Shepard ducked down as a biotically-driven chair came hurtling in her direction. She could hear curses being thrown and animalistic shrieks that nearly blew out her eardrums. Jack had really fucked up this time.

Rounding the corner, she spotted the pair deep in combat. What was most odd, though, was the fact that they were both almost completely naked. Miranda actually had both bra and panties on, but Jack was topless—though it was still hard to tell with all those tattoos. A part of Shepard had been hoping that Kenneth was just being his usual, perverted self, but now she saw the truth in his words. Between the liquor and gods-knew what kind of drugs Jack had spiked it with, something very bad had happened last night, and now she had to clean up the mess.

"Calm down you two!" Shepard roared in her best Commander-voice.

"Stay out of this, Shepard!" Jack snapped. "This bitch can't admit that we had fun, and now she wants to kill me even though it was _her _choice to join me!"

"Shut up!" Miranda threw a pulse of dark energy at the woman, who negated it with her own power. "You spiked my drink, you little whore!"

Jack laughed. "And you enjoyed every second of it! 'Oh, god! Oh, god! Harder!'"

She was good at that, Shepard had to admit. But it wasn't helping matters. Moving forward, Shepard tried to place herself in between the pair, gaze stern as she glared at each of them in turn.

"I'm sorry that you're upset, Miranda, and what Jack did was very wrong, but tearing apart the ship is not going to solve your problems! Get dressed and get back to your cabin."

Miranda started to deflate, powering down. "Very well, Shepard."

Satisfied that things had gone much better than she had hoped for, Shepard dropped her guard. What she _should _have been watching was Jack, because the crazy bitch just never knew when to keep her mouth shut.

"Come back any time, sweet cheeks. I had a blast."

The words had barely left Jack's mouth before Miranda's retort came roaring towards her. Only Shepard still stood in between them, and the full force of the biotic attack swept her up and launched her into the side wall. Hard metal dug into her back and Shepard slumped to the ground, dazed. The fight was back on in full force, furniture and dark energy flying every which way in a deadly barrage.

Shepard finally managed to get her wits back around her, and with a curse she rose to her feet. Moving slowly, Shepard snuck around behind Miranda. Luckily for her, the feuding women were far too involved to notice her anymore. Shepard stood directly behind the Cerberus woman and delivered a swift hit to the base of her skull. Miranda might have been a genetically modified marvel, but Shepard was a soldier, and her skin and bones had been toughened by many cybernetic enhancements both during and after her revival. The blow struck hard, and Miranda slumped to the ground like a sack of potatoes.

"Nice hit," Jack appraised, smirking.

Without missing a beat, Shepard stormed across the room and struck the smug woman across the face in an open-handed slap. Once again, her strength worked to her advantage and Jack was sent flying to the ground. Furious, the tattooed woman glared up at her.

"What the fuck was that for? She's the stupid bitch who attacked you!"

"Because of you!" Shepard snarled. "Seriously, Jack! You need to learn to control what you say, or to stick your foot in your big goddamn mouth before you speak! This is the last thing we need right now. Why did you drug her?"

Jack shrugged. "I thought it would be amusing to fuck the cheerleader. She's always such a tight-ass. I figured that if I could get her to loosen up, she'd be a lot of fun." She leveled Shepard with a lewd grin. "I was _so _right."

Shepard sighed gustily, rubbing her temples. There was an ache building in the back of her skull, and she was positive it was from a tumor she would name Jack.

"Please, Jack…while you're on my ship, do _not _drug anymore members of my crew. And if you two have something you need to settle, take it outside."

"Will do, Shepard. Now, you wanna leave her here, or…?"

Shepard glowered at the woman and Jack wisely stepped back, though she was still smiling.

"I will have someone take her up to medbay. If you value your hands, _do not _touch her again. Got it?"

"Yeah, yeah. I'll behave."

That would have to be good enough. Shepard was in too much pain to draw the argument out any further. She could already tell that her back was going to bruise wonderfully, and the ache in her head was intensifying. The only thing Shepard wanted now was to get up to her cabin and sleep the rest of the day. Surely everything else could wait until tomorrow?

Her teammates were still waiting for her in the hall when she walked back up the stairs. Shepard did her best to disguise the pain shooting through her back as she looked over at Jacob.

"Would you mind carrying Miranda up to the medbay? I don't think I hit her too hard, but better safe than sorry."

Chuckling, Jacob nodded and headed downstairs. 

"The festivities are over now," Shepard announced wearily. "Would one of you mind going outside and getting the rest of the crew onboard?"

"I will inform them," Samara volunteered.

"Thanks. Tell them it should be safe enough."

The asari nodded gracefully before heading towards the elevator. Looking around at the rest of her crew, Shepard smiled and shook her head.

"I would warn you all against drinking with Jack in the future. And the next time something like this happens, just knock one of 'em over the head and call it done. Okay?"

"Easier said than done, Shepard," Tali remarked. "I don't want to get my suit ripped open for one of those idiots."

Grunt snorted. "I told them I was gonna go down, but they wouldn't let me. Afraid I was gonna break a neck, or something."

Shepard sighed. "Point taken. Let's just hope it doesn't happen again. Now I suggest you all start preparing yourselves. We'll be going through the Omega 4 relay soon, and once we do, there's no turning back. Make sure you have everything in order, and come see me if there's anything you need."

"Of course, Shepard," Thane replied. "The same goes to you."

"Yes," Mordin agreed. "Come see me if your back gets worse. Have a good salve for bruising."

Shepard cursed under her breath at the salarian's perceptiveness as Garrus shot her a worried look. Forcing a smile, she nodded her head at her team and headed to the now vacant elevator. As always, Garrus was just a few steps behind her, and as soon as the doors closed, Shepard found herself being gently turned around so that he could lift up the fabric of her shirt.

"Hey, now!" she protested. "No hanky-panky in the elevator! This would be an awkward place to get caught with our pants down…"

"Just shut up," he ordered. It was a breach of protocol, but Shepard could only blink. That had to be the first time she had ever heard him say that.

Shepard finally relaxed and allowed Garrus to inspect her back, hoping that it didn't look too bad just yet. But from his pained hiss, she knew that it did.

"Which one of them did this?" he asked, furious. "Because I swear I'll go back down there and—"

"It was a mistake, Garrus. No need to start kicking skulls in." Shepard pulled her shirt back down, wincing. "I let my guard down and it happened. No harm, no foul."

"No harm? Your entire back is one giant bruise!"

"And I'll go get some of that salve from Mordin tomorrow! Just leave off it and let me have a few moments of peace!"

Reluctantly, Garrus obeyed. He really was overreacting, but it pissed him off that those two could be so careless. It would be a while before he could look at either woman again with something less than disgust in his eyes.

The elevator arrived at Shepard's cabin and she started towards her room, back hunched slightly as the pain really settled in. Garrus didn't try to help her, knowing that it would only irritate her. Shepard hated to admit when she was vulnerable, and with her temper as it was right now, he was certain she might bite his head off if he dared insinuate that she needed aid.

Shepard walked across her room and flopped down face-first on the bed, sighing as her cheek sunk into the pillows. Yes, this was what she wanted. To just sleep and not worry about anything. Sensing Garrus was still hovering by the door, she lifted an arm to beckon him forward. He perched himself on the bed beside her, hesitant to move any closer. Shepard sighed.

"I'm sorry that I snapped at you. I'm just really tired."

Garrus chuckled, running a talon lightly through her hair. "Me too. We might have overdone it last night."

"Not even close," she replied with a wicked smirk. "Why don't you lay down with me? We can try to get some sleep before something else blows up."

He quickly stripped off his armor and settled down next to her. Shepard turned on her side so that she could wrap herself around him, allowing his heartbeat to lull her into sleep.


	12. Chapter 12

Disclaimer: The song I quote in this story is called "Rooster" and it belongs wholly to the band Alice in Chains. I don't own it, I just _love _it.

Author's Note: I'll just apologize for the end of this chapter in advance. It's rushed and choppy, but in my defense, if you're reading this, chances are you've played the game and you know how it ends. I really didn't want to go into a lot of repetitive detail about the final mission, and so I just skimmed over it as best as I could so that it would be done and I could move on. Like I said before, the main purpose of this story is to establish the relationship between Garrus and Shepard that I envision, and I hope that I have done an adequate job of that. Perhaps a bit sappy, but I've always imagined that if you strip away the layers of defense Garrus keeps around himself, he would look a lot like this.

But then again, the wonderful people at Bioware know best, and I'm just borrowing the character for a smut fic. Whee!

Twelve

Shepard stared around the CIC from her perch at the galaxy map, her heart aching. It was so empty. So quiet. Before, she had taken the bustle of her crew for granted, normally tuning out the sounds of shuffling feet and tech talk that surrounded the place. But now that they were gone, the silence was oppressing.

The Collectors had taken her crew, and they were out of time. Joker was just waiting for her word to start heading towards the Omega 4 relay, and though she knew it was time to get moving, the command was frozen on her tongue. It was foolish to sit here and feel sorry for herself, but Shepard couldn't help it. Kelly's smiling face wasn't here to tell her about her messages; Rupert and Dr. Chakwas weren't at their stations, waving as she walked through; Gabby and Kenneth weren't down in their station bantering in the way she had come to adore. Guilt gnawed at the _Normandy's _Commander, because no matter how she looked at it, this was her fault. Shepard had let her team down, and if they didn't move quickly, the people she had come to love and respect would be gone forever.

Shepard punched up the map, inputting their destination. EDI's voice echoed over the ship's intercom:

"_Please confirm your destination, Shepard."_

She sucked in a deep breath, forcing the fear and remorse down her throat.

"It's time to get our people back. No more waiting."

"_Roger that, Commander," _Joker's voice responded. _"ETA about 2 hours."_

Shepard was beginning to hate the cramped walls of the elevator. Looking down at the floor, she spotted a smear of blood where one of her crew had probably been beaten and then dragged inside. The sight wrenched at her heart. Samara had brought up the point that had they been there, the galaxy would now have no one to protect it, but it didn't make the guilt feel any less damning. All she wanted to do now was spend the last of the time they had in her cabin, in peace. But she knew that would be impossible. These thoughts would never let her rest.

The last thing she expected when she stepped inside her cabin was the sound of cheesy jazz music; the lights had been dimmed, casting the room in soft shadow. Looking around, Shepard spotted Garrus seated at her couch, pouring out what looked like human liquor into two crystal tumblers. He looked up at her as she approached, mandibles flaring in a smile.

"Jacob found this for me. He says it's fourteen year old brandy and that it's supposed to be good."

Garrus stood and handed her a glass, which she took hesitantly. A part of her wanted to be alone to brood, but another part of her was glad he was here to keep her mind from going down that path. It was a silent battle with no real victor. Shepard didn't fight as Garrus hooked his fingers under her chin and lifted it up so that she had to look at him. He was surprised to see unshed tears brimming in her eyes.

"You can't blame yourself for what happened. It's not true and it won't bring them back."

"I know. But knowing that doesn't make it feel right."

Garrus sighed and lifted her hand holding the brandy glass higher to her lips. "Drink with me, Shepard. Worrying over it won't make any of this any easier. Just…stay with me for a little while and let's enjoy these last couple of hours before everything falls apart."

Shepard smiled as a few tears escaped her closing eyes. She took a sip of the brandy, hissing with a mix of pain and pleasure as it burned its way down her throat. _Note to self: thank Jacob._

Taking her hand, Garrus led her over to the couch where she flopped down and leaned against the cushions with a contented sigh. Shepard was no light-weight, but between the heady taste of the brandy and the stress of the day, she could feel herself getting a little light-headed. Garrus's strong arm draped over her shoulders and she snuggled close to him. He had done so much for her, and a part of Shepard felt like she didn't deserve his love. She had never met a man who attended to her so completely while still maintaining a safe distance from being suffocating. But then lately, Shepard felt like she could never get tired of seeing his face or falling asleep in his arms. She wanted him next to her at all times, and more often than not he was there.

Now it was time for her to do something for him. A "thank you" for everything.

Setting her glass down, Shepard went to her knees on the floor, positioning herself in between his legs. Garrus watched her, gaze hot as she spread his thighs and fumbled with the clasp of his pants. Once she had them undone, Shepard slid the garment off and reached down to press her mouth against the little opening in his carapace where she knew his cock was hiding, waiting to be aroused.

The feel of Shepard's soft lips against him sent Garrus into a whirlwind of pleasure. It didn't take long for his erection to show itself, and as soon as it escaped, Shepard trapped it in the warmth of her mouth. Whatever she couldn't fit inside was immediately set upon by her hands, firmly stroking him to full attention. Shepard ran her tongue up along the side of his cock as she bobbed her head up and down, looking up at him as she worked.

Garrus gazed down at her, panting. The sight of her pleasing him, those haunting emerald eyes watching him, sent his nerves to the edge of insanity. It was a feeling unlike any other he had ever experienced since turian women were unable to use their mouths in such a way. Even if they tried, Garrus wouldn't trust those sharp teeth anywhere near his manhood. But Shepard knew just the way to stroke him with her mouth and tongue, using her teeth to just barely graze his tender flesh.

After a few more strokes, Garrus felt himself reaching the edge. He knotted his hands in the fabric of the couch to keep from gripping her hair, throwing his head back as the white-hot intensity of his climax shook him. Shepard sucked down hard as he came, swallowing every drop he had to offer. When he was spent, Shepard released him, wiping her mouth as she smiled up at him. Garrus had begun to growl low in his throat, reaching down to pull her into his lap. They kissed passionately, Garrus's prehensile tongue stroking the insides of her mouth sensuously. When they parted, panting, Garrus pushed back the red curls that framed her face, looking deep into her eyes.

"I've never met anyone like you," he murmured.

"That's probably a good thing. I don't know how many Shepards this world can handle."

He chuckled. "One is plenty, yes. You are more than I could have ever dreamed for."

Shepard smiled down at him, pressing her lips to the bandage covering the right side of his face.

"You're getting all sensitive on me, Gare. Maybe you can sweet-talk the Collectors into surrendering?"

She laughed as he ground his hips against her, his cock—which was already hard again; it shocked and pleased her how quickly he recovered—slipped to press at her through her pants. Shepard took his face in her hands, her mood sobering.

"I feel the same way. That's why I have to say this, so just be quiet until I'm all done, ok?"

Wary, Garrus nodded nonetheless.

Shepard took a deep breath. "There's a good chance that one of us—both of us—might die today. If I die again, I don't want you to do anything stupid. No more throwing your life away, no more sorrow. You are too good for that, and I know you'll be able to recover as long as you give yourself the chance. Find yourself a good woman, and live a long life. Do you understand?"

Garrus had stayed silent through her spiel, blue eyes impassive. But every word struck at him, hit a chord in his heart that he had been trying very hard to suppress. It was easy for her to say such things; she wasn't the one who had to go through the death of the one she loved. Given, Shepard was the one who died, but in a way it was much easier to be dead than to be the one left behind. When you were dead, you didn't have to worry about the hurt the living had to suffer through. Garrus waited a moment after she finished, just staring at her. Then he exploded in a flurry of movement.

Shepard barely had time to register what was happening before she found herself on her back on the couch, Garrus's talons ripping off her pants. Still stunned, Shepard could only gasp as he entered her, thrusting deep and hard. Garrus used the tip of one talon to rub at her clit as he rode her, his eyes burning into her. Never once did his gaze waver; he watched her as she moaned and twisted beneath him, throwing her legs around his waist and arching her back off of the cushions to draw him in even deeper.

When she came, the walls of her vaginal passage clutched at his aching penis and after a few last, measured thrusts, he emptied himself. But still his eyes did not leave hers. The way Garrus watched her made Shepard feel as if his eyes were scouring her soul, uncovering every secret and leaving nothing untouched. What she had said had bothered him in some way—that much was obvious. She had expected it would, but his reaction was far from what she had been anticipating.

Garrus pulled out of her, hands planted firmly on either side of her head.

"Garrus?" she murmured, reaching up to brush her fingers across his jaw.

"If you die, Shepard, then I die. I lost you once, and I won't do it again. You need to understand that."

Shepard said nothing, just gazed at him with the pain in her heart clear in her eyes.

"Is there nothing I can say that will change your mind?"

Garrus slowly shook his head. "It's too late for words. I would follow you into hell if you asked it of me. And I'll be in hell if you leave me. My heart is yours until the day you no longer want it."

Her hand grasped his chin firmly, and now it was her turn to level a stern glare at him.

"When will you start believing me when I tell you that I love you? Throughout my entire life, I've never felt this way about anyone. If I have your heart, then don't you doubt for a second that you have mine, too."

Tears formed and fell from his eyes as he stared down at her. Shepard leaned forward to tenderly kiss them away, and he wrapped his arms around her in a loving embrace. It was insane, of course, but then love was a strange mechanism. Garrus swore to himself that the moment their mission was over, he would ask her to marry him. He had studied human culture to learn more about his lover, and Garrus understood that marriage was the ultimate culmination of a human relationship. They might never be able to have kids, but he couldn't wait for the memories.

"_Commander, we'll be at the Omega 4 relay in about 20 minutes."_

Wiping at his eyes with his sleeve, Garrus moved so that Shepard could sit up. They shared one last kiss before moving to don their armor. She finally remembered the cheesy jazz music still playing in the corner, and started giggling as she shut it off. Garrus rubbed the back of his head, embarrassed.

"I was hoping it would help you relax."

"It was a sweet thought. But for future reference, I like classic rock."

"Classic rock?"

"Yeah, it's really old music back from Earth that came out in the 1990s. One of my old gang mates played me an Alice in Chains album one day and I've been hooked ever since." She pressed a few buttons on the stereo, and Garrus listened as a low, seductive guitar began. It was slow and intoxicating, filling his senses completely. Then a male voice started, scratchy and a little odd, but somehow still completely addicting:

_Ain't found a way to kill me yet…_

_Eyes burn with stingin' sweat…_

_Seems every path leads me to nowhere…hmmm…_

Shepard let the song play while they dressed, letting the rhythm soak into her bones. It could be the last time she ever listened to it; best to savor the tune.

The ride through the debris field on the other side of the Omega 4 relay was wild; Shepard was immensely grateful to her team that they had known the right upgrades to install in the _Normandy _to keep everyone alive. The crew was rescued, and soon enough Shepard, Garrus, and Samara were on their way deep into the heart of the Collector base. It was difficult to fathom the giant human Reaper that waited for them at end, and with a righteous indignation Shepard was determined to destroy the monstrosity.

All of this flashed through Shepard's mind as she fried the last of the Reaper's circuits, and the giant construct began its crash. In a last bid for revenge, the monster's mechanical hand reached out and tried to drag the trio with it. Samara lost her footing and began sliding down towards the abyss, and without even thinking, Shepard dove after her. It was a frighteningly fast descent, but somehow she managed to grab the asari and drag her back onto a more level ground.

A second platform crashed into them, and Samara was sent flying away from her. A heavy beam hit Shepard and she crumpled to the ground, gritting her teeth as she fought to overcome the pain. They weren't done yet; she had to get her team out of this place. Shepard slid herself out from under the beam, ignoring the screaming pain in her ribs as she rushed over to where Samara lay motionless. The asari's eyes fluttered open when Shepard shook her, and once Samara was back on her feet, Shepard cast about frantically for Garrus.

She spotted him pinned beneath another beam, this one much larger than the one that had hit her. Fear closing around her throat, she ran to him and forced the hunk of metal off with pure adrenaline. When his blue eyes blearily met hers, Shepard felt like crying. She helped him up and they quickly embraced as if afraid the other was just a dream.

But they weren't safe yet. All around them, the station was beginning to crumble. It was a mad dash for the exit, Shepard roaring into her comm for Joker to be ready. Collectors swarmed around them, and the trio did their best to keep the creatures at bay while maintaining their frantic pace.

The _Normandy _was just ahead of them, and Shepard felt for sure that the open door had to be the gates to heaven. Samara cleared the gap first, then Garrus; Shepard brought up the rear, cursing as a large chunk of floor lengthened her distance to the door. But she'd be damned if she gave up now. Shepard picked up her pace and then leapt, extending her legs as far as they would go, desperately praying that she would reach the door. So close, so close…

She struck the bottom edge of the opening, clawing at the floor for dear life. Garrus was there to pull her in while Samara and Joker provided covering fire. Garrus yanked her inside, and she fell on top of him just as the doors closed and EDI piloted the ship away from the coming explosion. Shepard lay there on the turian's chest, breathing heavily.

They had lived. It was too much to believe. But here they were, everyone alive and the human Reaper a ruin behind them. Shepard threw her arms around Garrus's neck and laughed.


	13. Chapter 13

Disclaimer: The song I used in this chapter is called "Echo"and belongs solely to the band Incubus. I own no rights to it whatsoever, I just think it's absolutely beautiful (especially since Brandon Boyd's sexy voice is the one performing it).

Author's Note: This is the end of this story. I hope you all enjoyed, and I'm sorry if my semi-scattered way of writing threw anyone off. Writing a story like this isn't easy when I'm trying so hard to cut out most of the game and focus solely on just a few characters—not to mention attempting to keep it short. But I think 13 is a good place to stop—lucky number and all.

I had fun writing this, and I dearly hope that you had fun reading it. If you hated it, leave me some constructive criticism in the review area. I'm always looking for ways to improve my writing. But overall, I suggest just taking the story for what it is: an overview of the romantic escapades between two similarly stubborn people.

Thirteen

It hadn't been very hard to break from Cerberus; Shepard hadn't trusted them from the very beginning, and the Illusive Man's ruthlessness proved that her initial instincts had been correct. A few members of the crew had left—too afraid to lose their cushy pay and benefits—but the majority had stayed, and for that Shepard was grateful. They would need a good crew to take on the Reapers, and she trusted the people of the _Normandy _implicitly.

Unfortunately, Samara needed to return to her justicar duties and Grunt wanted to return to Tuchanka, to finally be a part of krogan culture. Shepard was sad to see them go, but had no intention of stopping them. There was only so much she could ask of the people who chose to follow her, and when their time to leave came, she would send them off with all the respect they deserved.

Garrus was still with her, of course. After the mission and Shepard's final middle finger to the Illusive Man, they had retired to her cabin and fucked; hard and frantic as if in an attempt to make sure that they really were still alive. There would be time for love later.

Now Shepard sat in the mess hall, surrounded by her crew as they held a celebratory party for their victory. With Grunt gone, she stuck to drinking beer; no one else was brave enough to challenge her to a drinking contest after her near victory over a krogan. Someone had broken out a karaoke machine—Shepard wondered where on earth they had been hiding it—and now a trio of women—including a very tipsy Gabby—were singing off-key to the song "Heartbreaker"by Pat Benatar. She laughed as they stumbled drunkenly over the words, the women breaking into giggles of their own every line.

Finally, the song ended and the three took their seats. Shepard vaguely thought about doing her own riff, but decided against it. Her singing voice had a way of making people run for the hills. But when Garrus stepped up and took the mic, she nearly spit out her beer all over the table in surprise. She wasn't the only one in shock; as the turian stood there, flipping through the library of songs, all eyes were on him. Astonishment and intrigue filled the room, but Garrus ignored them. Finally, he reached the song he wanted and lifted the mic to his mouth as the first, soothing chords began. And when he started to sing, warm gaze never leaving hers…gods, she could melt.

_There's something about the look in your eyes_

_Something I noticed when the light was just right_

_It reminded me twice that I was alive_

_And it reminded me that you're so worth the fight_

_Ooooh, yeah…_

_My biggest fear will be the rescue of me_

_Strange how it turns out that way, yeah_

_Could you show me, dear?_

_Something I've not seen_

_Something infernally interesting_

_Could you show me, dear?_

_Something I've not seen_

_Something infernally interesting_

_Ohhh…_

_There's something about the way you move_

_I see your mouth in slow motion when you sing_

_So subtle it's something someone contrives_

_Your movements echo that I have seen the real thing_

_Ooooh, yeah…_

_Your biggest fear will be the rescue of you_

_Strange how it turns out that way, yeah_

_Could you show me, dear?_

_Something I've not seen_

_Something infernally interesting_

_Could you show me, dear?_

_Something I've not seen_

_Something infernally interesting_

_Ohhh…_

Garrus was standing right in front of her now, not even needing the screen to finish the song. Shepard watched him, breathless. She didn't know how he had found the song and had no idea that anyone could sing it so beautifully, but Shepard was touched deeply. As his voice hit the last note, Garrus lowered himself to one knee in front of her. All eyes were on them in a crowded room, but Shepard was certain that they were the only two people alive at that moment. Nothing else mattered.

Reaching into his pocket, Garrus pulled out a little velvet box—the same box he had used to give her the flower back on Hras Anna. Only this time, she knew that there wouldn't be a flower inside. When he peeled back the top of the box, Shepard couldn't stop the tears that spilled over her cheeks. It wasn't a diamond or anything else flashy; the "ring" was merely a little steel gasket that he had probably picked up from the Collector ship before they had begun their escape. Something so small, so insignificant, and yet it pierced her heart like a bullet.

"Shepard," he started, voice husky, "will you marry me?"

She threw herself at him before the last syllable had been uttered; they tumbled back onto the tile, her lips pressed against his mouth as her tears continued to pour down unheeded. Her arms were wrapped tightly around his neck, and Shepard never wanted to let him go. Garrus encircled her waist and held her close, wondering how it was that he had found such happiness.

The crew watched their Commander and her lover, many of the women crying themselves. Jack started to sniffle, and quickly hid her emotions behind a shot of whiskey. Thane smiled, thinking back on a time when he had known such happiness. Jacob eyed Miranda across the room, who ignored him as she rolled her eyes, smirking. Tali adjusted a piece of her face mask, the curve of her head making it obvious that she was smiling. Joker sighed and took a long drink from his beer. Mordin checked his omni-tool to make sure that he had an ample supply of his allergy medication.

"Get a room you two!" Joker hollered as the pair began to get a little more grabby.

Blushing, Shepard straightened up so that she could take her weight off of him. Garrus just smiled and slid the ring onto her left index finger. Giggling, she moved it to its correct position.

"Sorry. Guess I should have read up on that a bit better."

Shepard shook her head. "Don't apologize." Her lips pressed against him once more. "Thank you," she murmured before pulling away.

The pair rose to their feet, and the crowd around them broke into thunderous applause. Shepard's face was completely red now, but it didn't matter. The gasket/ring on her finger burned a pleasant line into her heart, and she was filled to the brim with an unimaginable joy.

More drinks were poured and Shepard listened to her crew joke and laugh as she leaned against the curve of her lover's—no, her fiancé's body. The Reapers would be here all too soon, but for tonight, that didn't matter. All that did matter was the moment, and that they were here, alive, together.

Shepard caught Garrus's eye and knew he felt the same.

"So, should we start calling you Vakarian instead of Shepard?" Joker interjected, his words slurred.

They all laughed at the quandary. Shepard couldn't remember a time in her life when people didn't refer to her by her surname, or Commander. She didn't mind the sound of Garrus's clan name, but wondered if she could really give up her own. "Jane" was out of the question; the last person to call her that had been laid flat by a vicious right hook.

"Inconceivable. Shepard will always be Shepard." Mordin winked at her, raising his glass in salute.

She returned the gesture, grinning like a fool. "Call me Spartacus!" The alcohol was really settling in now.

"No, I am Spartacus!" Joker rose to his feet, spilling beer everywhere.

The human crew laughed themselves to tears while the non-humans looked at one another and shrugged.

Aliens; such odd creatures.


End file.
